Roommate problems – who hasn’t had them? According to Georgetown University, one-third of college studentsreporthaving problems with theirroommates. Sometimes it’s not doing the dishes, other times it’s listening to loud music at night, but most roommates are able to end things with civility.

What’s not cool is when your friends and roommates start stealing from you, and then they have the gall togaslightyou about it. That’s what happened tothis womanwhen she offered a friend to stay at her place for free. And when she confronted the friend about it, all he had to say was that she’s “Really messing up [his] day.”

Bored Pandareached out to the woman who shared this story,u/RoommateMovingOut. She kindly agreed to share more details about the whole situation and why she won’t let anyone stay at her place, at least for a little while.

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A friend’s stay at her apartment became quite a headache for a woman when some personal things disappeared after his stay

A concerned woman in a blue sweater, seated on the floor and looking at her phone in an apartment.

Image credits:davidgyung / Envato (not the actual photo)

The woman shared the story with the Internet, asking if she’s overreacting

Image credits:RoommateMovingOut

This is what the woman’s correspondence with her friend looked like

Text messages discussing missing items in an apartment after a roommate’s stay.

Text conversation about missing apartment items with a roommate.

Text conversation about missing items between friends, mentioning speakers and knives possibly taken by a roommate.

Text conversation about missing knives between roommates in an apartment.

Knife set and hard drive listed online, related to stolen apartment items.

Text messages discussing a roommate possibly stealing stuff from an apartment.

Text exchange about a roommate possibly taking items, discussing compensation for staying in an apartment.

Text conversation about a roommate allegedly stealing stuff from an apartment.

Text conversation showing frustration about roommate taking things from apartment.

Text conversation about friend’s roommate who stole items from an apartment.

The author said she finds it hard to understand why they would steal the hard drive, as it was mostly just personal stuff

Text exchange discussing trust issues with a friend-roommate who stole stuff from an apartment.

Reddit discussion about a friend’s roommate stealing stuff from their apartment.

Chat comments discussing a roommate selling stolen stuff on Facebook Marketplace.

Reddit thread discussing a friend’s roommate who stole stuff from an apartment.

Discussion about a roommate stealing items, including a hard drive, from an apartment.

Discussion about a roommate stealing stuff, focusing on losing a hard drive with important data.

People said the woman is under-reacting and needs to involve the authorities ASAP

Reddit comments about a roommate who stole stuff from an apartment.

Comment discussing a theft by a roommate in an apartment, suggesting immediate police contact.

Text message about a roommate stealing possessions from an apartment.

Text comment discussing a roommate who stole items in an apartment, posted online under a different account.

Reddit comment discussing friends and roommate who stole stuff from an apartment.

Text comment about involving police after a roommate stole items from an apartment, suggesting a setup to recover them.

Comment advises filing a police report and reporting stolen items on Facebook Marketplace, related to a roommate incident.

Comment about a roommate stealing stuff in an apartment.

User comment on a post about a roommate stealing stuff from an apartment, saying “REACT MORE TBH”.

Text comment about realizing more stuff is missing from an apartment roommate theft incident.

Reddit comment discussing situation of friends and roommate stealing from an apartment.

After she filed a police report, the friend finally got in touch: “This is really messing up my day”

Text message exchange showing a friend’s upset response after a roommate stole stuff from their apartment.

A couple of days later, the woman got her stuff back, but not without a few hiccups

A concerned woman in an apartment with a Christmas tree, highlighting a roommate issue.

Image credits:MikeShots / Envato (not the actual photo)

Text about friend’s roommate stealing stuff, discussing updates on stolen items and friend’s reaction.

Text describing a police report about a roommate allegedly stealing from an apartment.

Text message from a roommate describing stolen apartment items and recovery attempt.

Text about recovering stolen items from a friend’s roommate in an apartment.

Text about filing a restraining order against a friend for theft and emotional distress in an apartment setting.

Text describing a situation involving a friend’s roommate stealing from an apartment.

Text discusses pursuing a legal case over stolen items by a roommate, with potential penalties.

Text discussing the conflict of a friend and roommate who stole stuff from an apartment.

Text about a roommate potentially facing a criminal record, affecting job prospects with the municipal government.

Text highlighting a roommate’s lack of remorse after stealing items from a friend’s apartment.

Police officer handcuffing a person with hands in close-up, related to roommate theft in an apartment.

Image credits:Joyseulay / Envato (not the actual photo)

Text discussing legal action after a roommate stole stuff from an apartment, expressing a desire for justice.

The woman tells us she only knew her “friend” for a couple of years, but felt a strong connection

As she only posted her update yesterday, the Redditor is still grappling with her decision to get the authorities involved. She’s also not sure about what to do in the future, whether to pursue legal action against her former friend or not. “I am still feeling very conflicted – more so than I put in my update post,” u/RoommateMovingOut revealed to Bored Panda.

She also told us the friend’s name, but asked us not to publicize it. “I’ve known [him] since I moved to Toronto in 2022,” the Redditor gives some background about her and her ex-friend’s relationship.

“We are both graduate students but at different universities. I met him through a mutual friend – she has known him since elementary school. We weren’t so close that we would hang out on our own, but we saw each other regularly with my close friend (and other friends): potlucks, trips to the bar, the movies.”

“I don’t have manyfriendsin Toronto, so I was grateful to be part of a small group of people who welcomed me,” the Redditor goes on. “I found him in particular funny. He had a self-deprecating sense of humor, but he was also sweet and quick with compliments. He was often down on himself or down on his luck, but he was not an attention-seeker.”

The man’s friends knew he was struggling financially, and now the OP sees some red flags she might have missed

Woman Threatens Legal Action After Friend’s Roommate Steals From Her, The Truth Finally Comes Out

Image credits:kues1 / Freepik (not the actual photo)

Their financial situations, however, were very different. Whereas the “friend” was struggling, the OP was in a better boat when it came to money. “He had a lot of debt fromstudent loans, and I was fortunate in that my parents helped me pay for my education,” she tells Bored Panda.

“Starting in September, four friends (including him) and I had been doing a weekly potluck,” she adds. “He hosted in October, and I really felt the high stress of his living situation. That night ended with him shutting down and shutting us out. Because it was someone I knew so well I didn’t think twice when it came to offering him my place for the month,” the OP says.

However, she now sees thered flagsshe might’ve missed when he was staying in her apartment back in November. She says he wouldn’t communicate as well as she’ would have liked. “I would have to follow up multiple times and would rarely get a response,” u/RoommateMovingOut recalls. “And the few times I tried calling him, he made an excuse that he couldn’t talk.”

The Redditor doesn’t feel like revenge is the best course of action here, and she  feels conflicted about what to do next

Woman Threatens Legal Action After Friend’s Roommate Steals From Her, The Truth Finally Comes Out

Image credits:cookie_studio / Freepik (not the actual)

We asked the Redditor how she felt when she got the call from a stranger claiming to have her stuff. “The call really stressed me out,” she admits. “I thought at first I wasbeing pranked. I had shared the post with my fiancé and I know he told some friends, and I thought maybe someone was messing with me. I almost hung up the phone right away.”

However, she is still very conflicted about taking legal action. “I talked to my sister who said it’s basically weaponizing the justice system, which feels really unfair too, especially now that I got a lot of the stuff back,” u/RoommateMovingOut says.

“I don’t know if I am there personally, but I can empathize with their pain,” she admits. “I think the only concrete lesson so far for me is that there is often a lot more going on in a person’s life than they are willing to share. I can at least say with certainty that I won’t let anyone stay at my place for a while,” she adds.

Text illustrating a roommate’s frustration after items were stolen from their apartment.

Commentary on a friend’s roommate stealing belongings and false apologies.

Text expressing frustration over issues with a roommate who stole stuff.

Text conversation about consequences of a roommate stealing stuff in an apartment.

Advice on pressing charges against a roommate for stealing items from an apartment.

Text post about friendship betrayal, discussing how a roommate stealing from an apartment shows they were never a friend.

Comment about confronting a friend-roommate who stole stuff, mentioning lack of remorse until police were involved.

Text response discussing a friend’s roommate who stole stuff from their apartment.

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