One of the hallmarks of a truly goodfriendis that they respect you. And that means that they’re aware of your boundaries, support you through your ups and downs, and generally invest in your relationship. Friendships require a give-and-take dynamic. If you’re the one always doing favors for them and constantly feeltaken advantageof, something’s off.
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Not all friends respect you as much as you do them. Unfortunately, some folks are willing to take advantage of you if you let them
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A woman went viral after sharing how she got back at her cheap friend who would constantly ‘forget’ to bring her wallet when going out
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Talking about money is tough. But if you ignore the problem, you’re giving others the green light to cheat you
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Money issues can be very awkward to talk about. It doesn’t matter if that person is afriend, relative, or coworker, there’s a certain amount of guilt and taboo attached to these topics. However, the more you tackle them, the more comfortable you get.
To put it very simply, you need to have those weird conversations with your friends if you keep having to pay for them at dinner, clubs, etc. Not only is it a large financial burden, you’ll also probably feel on edge whenever you go out with them, so it diminishes the fun you’re having anyway.
If you think what you have is a real friendship, if there are years and years of positive experiences between you and your pal, then you owe it to them to be honest. Real friendship is about being transparent, not just supportive.
You should be able to trust your friends to be real with you and call you out when you’re doing something wrong and when your behavior affects them in a bad way. Look, everyone makes mistakes, nobody’s perfect, you’ve heard it all before. And some mistakes are genuine accidents, so you need to hone your self-awareness. But if you’re intentionally deceiving your buddies to save a bit of cash, well, that responsibility to do better and be better falls on you.
There are other ways to pay for dinner even if you’ve forgotten your wallet. Remember, you have a phone!
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A good rule of thumb is to only ever lend money to people you trust, so if you’re ever on the fence about a request for cash, err on the side of caution. Look at the person’s history. Are they reliable? Have they paid you back before? Are they timely in those situations or do they keep ‘forgetting’ to repay you? Only lend money that you’d be okay with never getting back.
If someone asks you for cash or wants you to pay for them, it’s fine to say ‘no.’ It’s perfectly possible to maintain your health boundaries while also keeping things light and friendly. After all, you might be concerned about your budget and trying to save money, too. So, if you feel that something’s off, resist that social pressure and stick to your boundaries.
Of course, there are moments in life when someone genuinely does forget their wallet at home, and it’s important to consider that possibility. However, in this day and age, there are so many ways to pay for things that it’s ridiculous.
Even if you don’t have your card with you and you’ve left all of your cash at home, which is still apopularpayment method in many countries, you can just pay with yourphonesor transfer the money they owe you from their bank account to yours. All it takes is a few taps on the screen. In short, if you ‘forgot’ your wallet but brought your phone, then you still have tons of ways to pay your share of the bill.
When paying for someone else or lending them money, remember not to hurt your financial situation
It also helps if you’re a tad flexible (even if you’re completely in the right): try to listen to their side of things and consider asking them to pay you back in small chunks over time. If nothing seems to work, then you can take the person to small claims court. Of course, it helps if you have a written agreement and other evidence about the loan. Alternatively, you can write the money off as a loss, cut ties with the person, and learn from the entire debacle.
If your friends leave you to pay the bill on your own, they might assume that you earn substantiallymore moneythan they do or they’re simply being jerks. It can be a wake-up call that you may need to spend time with other people, who value you more and respect you as an individual, not a walking, talking ATM.
Most readers thought the woman’s approach was brilliant. They supported her sneaky revenge story
Not everyone was a fan of how the author handled the situation. Here’s what they said she should have done
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