Family gatherings can be exhausting for many reasons, and prodding, invasive questions from distant relatives is certainly one of them. Whether you’re single or in a relationship, nothing can protect you from “when are you getting married?” and “when are you having children?” And if you don’t want to embarrassingly stammer searching for an appropriate answer, you better have a comeback prepared.
When it comes to nosey questions, “when are you having kids?” is definitely right at the top of the list
Image credits:bippityboppitybree
This TikToker has the best answer up her sleeve for anyone interested in her familial status
“I am 25 years old. So I’m at the age where, well, honestly, as soon as you hit your 20s, people love to ask women this. But people have always asked me, “Do you have kids?” And I always say, “Absolutely not. I am still a child.” But they love asking me if I have kids. And I say, “No, I will not be having kids. And would you like to know why?” And they say, of course.”
“And I say ‘I would love, love, love to be a parent. I would love to be a dad. I don’t get that choice. I would have to be a mother. And there’s no way in hell I would ever want to be a mother.’ And watching the initial confusion on their face, and then the awareness, the acknowledgment, you can see the gears turning. It makes sense. I don’t want the responsibility of being a mother. I want to be the cool parent. I want to have as little responsibility as possible and mothers don’t get that.”
See her whole argument here
Her argument, of course, is clear. Being a mother is so much harder than being a dad. It involves more time and effort and is more demanding physically and emotionally.
That is why there’s no surprise that many in the comment section agreed with the TikToker’s opinion. Typically, taking on the role of a mother is a big responsibility. And while dads also participate in childrearing, the demands for them are simply not as high.
Image credits:Bethany Beck (not the actual photo)
Mothers take on a whole lot more responsibilities in managing the household
Jancee Dunn, the author of “How not to hate your husband after kids,” wrote the book when she noticed this disparity in motherly and fatherly duties in her own life. In it, she describes the frustrating situation many women find themselves in after becoming mothers.
Firstly, mothers tend to handle the more involved child care aspects such as feeding, changing diapers, and nighttime routines. In the meantime, the dads fall into the role of the “fun parent” who plays with children and takes them out to have fun, all while mom cleans up the house and prepares dinner.
When you also consider household chores such as cooking, cleaning, and laundry, most of which often fall on the mother, you really see the point that the TikToker was making in her video.
Image credits:Jep Gambardella (not the actual photo)
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