High school drama usually revolves around crushes, cliques, and the occasional cafeteria food fight. But imagine swapping all that for diaper duty and bedtime stories. Being a teen is tough enough, but when you’re also the big brother to three young siblings, life can get pretty intense. Forget who’s dating who or what happened at the last party—this is real-life drama on another level.
While for most high schoolers drama means schoolyard gossip or navigating tricky friendships, for one Redditor, let’s just call him Jack, histeenyears came with a much heavier load—literally. At just 17, Jack found himself juggling homework, hormones, and the heavy responsibility of raising his younger siblings.
More info:Reddit
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The teen has been raising his siblings since he was very young, doing everything for them, from cooking to helping them with homework
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As the big brother, Jack sometimes helped his parents out with the 3 younger kids. At first, it was the occasional night watch, but soon, Jack was asked tocookfor his siblings, help with homework and walk them to school, amongst other things. It didn’t take long before his role as a big brother turned into a demanding full-time nanny position.
Jack’s folks casually informed their 17-year-old son to get ready for more sleepless nights and diaper changes, but this time, he was not having it. He had already sacrificed most of his teenage years taking care of the other 3 kids and he wasn’t about to take on one more. “I wasn’t going to skip my own life to raise aninfantfrom the start,” Jack recalls.
His parents were shocked, as they were not expecting such a response. They even tried to convince his younger siblings to step up, but unsurprisingly, they refused.
It sounds like Jack’s folks forced their teen son into a parenting role he didn’t want or ask for. According toexperts, parentification, where children are thrown into adult roles, significantly impacts their mental health.
“Parentification happens when a child is made to take on the role of an adult emotionally, financially, or through other responsibilities, without support from their parents or other adults. This can harm the child’s development and lead to a number of mental health problems and negative outcomes later in life,” experts explain.
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“These teenagers are at increased risk of developing anxiety, depression, or even PTSD depending on the reason(s) they became parentified in the first place. In the long term, these psychological effects could have a negative impact on their school performance and social interactions, leading to poorer outcomes in adulthood,” Hughes explained.
When asked how parents can balance the need for sibling caregiving without overburdening their older children, Hughes suggests that teens should have a clear view of their priorities, whether it’s school or extracurriculars, and discuss with their parents about them.
“A good way to approach this discussion is to suggest creating or updating the family calendar to ensure your activity times are protected. During this conversation, it’s also beneficial to mention when you’re available to help with younger siblings—whether it’s specific hours each day or certain days of the week,” Hughes explains.
So, is Jack the A-hole for refusing to take on more parental duties? Was he right to suggest adoption, or should he have bitten the bullet one last time? Share your thoughts in the comment section below!
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