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Sadly, some parents tend to be very judgmental of their kids, which leaves them feeling both confused and sad
Image credits:andreas / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits:freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits:Liza Summer / Pexels (not the actual photo)
She also always compares her to her friends’ daughters, who in her eyes are perfect all around
Image credits:55j5
For example, one day the author went shopping with her. When they were talking about theclothesthat she bought, the mom said “It’s not like you have anywhere to wear them as you never go out.” And while, yes, maybe the original poster doesn’t go out as much, the clothes were pretty basic, not for going out.
Besides, everyone has a different idea of what “going-out clothes” look like. Here, as discussed on this Redditthread, some people like to go out wearing “fun” tops, skirts, and jeans. For others, it depends on the place they’re going, the time, and so on. So, for this mom to judge the clothes her daughter bought was just plain mean.
Clothing choices aren’t the only thing this mom is mean about. Basically, she’s judgmental of everything her daughter does. And she doesn’t apply the same judginess to herfriends’ kids of similar ages. She always gushes about them – how beautiful, fun, and rich they are. And she never says anything that nice about her daughter.
In fact, instead of saying something nice, she implies that her daughter is an unlikeable and forgettable person. For instance, she said that her oldcolleaguesprobably wouldn’t remember her and her university supervisor wouldn’t either. And if someone does, it’s probably out of pity.
Image credits:gpointstudio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
There are theories that some mothers are critical of their daughters because they’rejealousof them. Apparently, some moms perceive their girls as a threat, so they go out of their way to criticize them, diminishing their self-esteem.
The reasons why some moms are jealous of their daughters can be various. For some, it’s because of their looks; for others, it can be material possessions or achievements. Back in the day, when women’s opportunities were more restricted, daughters and moms had quite similar lives. But nowadays they have moreopportunities, and so some mothers tend to resent their daughters for the different choices they make, thus ending in different lives.
Passive-aggressivecommunication leads to people feeling misunderstood and lonely, and it all can negatively impact their mental health. So, basically, using this communication technique is doing more harm than good.
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