Today’s Original Poster (OP) found herself in the same predicament when her mom decided to make it all about one thing— her smile. What should have been a fun time during the family vacation ended in tears as the OP decided she’d had enough.
More info:Reddit
RELATED:
It’s one thing to receive an unsolicited comment once, it’s another to hear it repeatedly— so sometimes, you just have to leave the picture
Image credits:Tima Miroshnichenko / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The author has struggled with chronic pain for the longest time and doesn’t necessarily get along great with her mother
Image credits:Chickens_n_Kittens
Image credits:Drazen Zigic / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits:Askar Abayev / Pexels (not the actual photo)
She felt bad for storming off and leaving her husband and kids, so she began to wonder if she was wrong for leaving angrily
They were out for the first family dinner and the OP asked her father to take a picture of her with her husband and kids. As the family posed for thephoto, the OP tried her best to smile despite the constant physical pain she has to endure.
But when she thought everything was fine, her mom spoke up, insisting that her smile was “horrible.” Rather than let the moment go, the mom made it worse, demonstrating how the OP’s face supposedly looked as if she was pulling her own face into exaggerated expressions.
Her smile wasn’t perfect, but it wasn’t as bad as her mom made it seem. The OP’s frustration wasn’t just about the photo, though. It was the accumulation of years her mom had spent downplaying her pain.
It isn’t small pain. It’s pain that has taken her career and energy. Yet her mom has constantly minimized the seriousness of theillness, acting as if it was no worse than a mild headache.
After being criticized about her smile, she decided she didn’t want to be in the pictures anymore; however, that wasn’t the end. The OP’s mom followed her, justifying herself and insisting that her smile had indeed been awful.
The OP couldn’t take it anymore. She decided she was done with dinner as well and told her husband and kids that she was leaving before retreating to her room in tears. She felt guilty for ruining the family dinner, but after everything—her pain, her mom’s constant undermining—she was emotionally drained.
Image credits:cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Emotional abuse can be often difficult to recognize, especially when it comes to parents with their kids. However, Parenting For Brain just mightdeclarethe OP’s mother’s actions emotional abuse.
This abuse can typically result in “low self-esteem, emotional instability, withdrawal, pessimism about the future, self-directed anger or self-blame”. They go further to state that it can even lead to poor physical health like having irritable bowelsyndrome, fibromyalgia or chronic pain.
Could it be mere coincidence that the OP seems to have battled chronic pain for the most part of her life, then? Given hermother’sdismissive attitude towards her and her condition, it’s not far-fetched.
Many also advised her to set boundaries and prioritize her well-being, recommending that she distance herself from her mother and avoid joint vacations in the future as it would be better for her mental health.
How would you have reacted in this situation? Do you think the OP should have walked away or let it slide? We would love to hear your thoughts!
Netizens labeled the author’s mother’s behavior as toxic and urged the author to establish boundaries for her own well-being
Thanks! Check out the results:You May LikeMan Accuses “Terrible” Sister Of Prioritizing Her Dog’s Life Over His Career, Family AgreesGabija PalšytėWoman Breaks Off Her Engagement After Finding Out How Her SIL Really Got PregnantViktorija OšikaitėDad Defends Gay Son From Homophobic Parents, Kicks Them Out Of His HomeGabija Saveiskyte
Gabija Palšytė
Viktorija Ošikaitė
Gabija Saveiskyte
Relationships
