Raising kids can be expensive.Researchfrom LendingTree shows that the cost ofraising a childfrom birth to the age of 18 is around $240,000. Daycare, after-school clubs, transportation, food – the expenses are endless. Clothes also fall into this category, as kids don’t really have that much discipline for not being messy, so they might need new ones more often than adults do.
That’s why one mom says she simplycan’t affordto buy her preschool daughter new clothes every time she stains them. The mom,Marla Branyan, shared her opinion on why it’s okay if your kid goes to school with a stained wardrobe. Stained does not equal dirty, she says. However, she got mixed reactions from people, as some disagreed.
Bored Pandareached out to Marla and she was kind enough to tell us more about her video. She says she did expect her opinion to strike a chord with parents, but she didn’t think it would get so much attention online and become so viral. Read our conversation with her below!
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Kids can be messy: they eat, they paint, they sometimes play in the mud, and their clothes get stained
Image credits:Matthias Zomer (not the actual photo)
One mom explained that she doesn’t think sending kids to school in stained clothes is such a bad thing
“This is your reminder that it’s okay to send your kids to school in clean, stained clothes.”
Image credits:marla_branyan
“I have a three-and-a-half-year-old. She goes to preschool. She stained these while at preschool. Why would I not send her to school in the stained clothes that she stained at school?”
“She messy. She’s living her best life, and I will continue sending her in the stained clothes because I can’t afford to keep replacing these pants every single week. Okay, I can’t.”
“And Goodwill only has a variety of patterns. They don’t have plain stuff.”
Her video went viral and now has over 1.2 million views
She explained her rationale in a follow-up video
The mom in the video, Marla Branyan, is a firm believer that we should allow kids to be messy
Although the attention online for Marla is somewhat overwhelming, she says it’s nice to know many commenters agree with her. “Even though that does make me feel good, I’m even more happy that so many kids have parents who allow them opportunities to be messy and have fun instead of worrying about their clothes at such a young age!” she tells Bored Panda.
“In order to work on those gross and fine motor skills, kids need [hands-on] activities like cutting with scissors, playing with playdough, holding things like big crayons and paintbrushes, running, climbing, the list goes on. Fun, engaging, and even intentionally messy activities help make learning fun!”
“Preschool and daycare [are] all aboutmaking learning fun, playing with others, and becoming familiar with learning. The last thing a kid needs in an environment like this is to be worried about getting messy because mommy or daddy is going to be upset they ruined something,” Branyan says. “Are there times when kids need to ‘try’ to stay clean, like at a wedding or church? Absolutely! Daycare and preschool [are] not one of those times,” she says firmly.
Image credits:Gabe Pierce (not the actual photo)
She says that realizing there’s nothing wrong in sending kids back to school in the clothes they stained there gave her a huge sense of relief
“Most of them said it actually takes [the] pressure off them to keep kids clean in an environment that’s [set up] to play, paint, and inevitably get messy. Many said they actually tell parents to send kids IN play clothes in hopes of avoiding an upset [parent] because something got ruined.”
Branyan says that she wanted “to remove a lot of the added stress we as parents put on our own shoulders.” She’s no stranger to feeling like her kids need to look perfect at school and daycare. “When I finally had the realization or ‘lightbulb moment’ that most of the stains were coming from preschool, therefore, it should be okay to send them back to school in those clothes, I felt a HUGE sense of freedom.”
“I just want other parents to have that freedom I feel,” she gets honest. “I also wantedparents who struggle with sending their kids in clean, stained clothes to reflect and find out why that is! Our intentions [matter], and it’s really beneficial to ask ourselves why we do what we do so we can make sure we’re not projecting our own adult insecurities onto our kids.”
Image credits:Erika Fletcher (not the actual photo)
Messy play for kids is totally normal
Manyparents know the strugglewhen you pick up your kid from daycare and see a new stain on their clothes. Whether it’s grass, paint, or some mystery pink blob, kids aren’t known for thinking about their clothes when playing.
And many experts say that it’s okay. Apparently, getting dirty while playing is important and can even benefit kids. According toSchoolhouse Daycare, it allows children to explore, fostering their curiosity and imagination. Playing with sand, water, chalk, or paint allows kids to better understand their senses – they touch, smell, and taste these things. That’s how they get to know the world around them.
If a kid is getting messy while playing with other children, like in daycare, that helps them improve their communication skills. Almost any time kids interact with each other, it’s an opportunity to learn more about sharing and negotiating.
And those parents who’ve seen their kids engage in messy play can probably attest that there’s almost nothing that kids love more than some fun times in a puddle or making a mud pie. That’s because it’sa way for them to de-stresswhile being immersed in nature.
The mom got mixed reactions from people: some agreed with her
Others had a different opinion
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