An unexpected act ofkindnessfrom a random stranger can turn your entire day around. Perhaps someone stops you as you’re exiting an elevator to tell you how beautiful your hair is. Maybe agood samaritanpulls over to help you change a tire. Or a friendly barista decides that your drink is on the house today.
These moments can restore my faith in humanity faster than almost anything else. But it’s important that when we go out of our way to be kind to others, we don’t expect anything in return. One man was recently shamed for ending a “pay it forward” chain at a food court, so he reached out to Reddit to see if he was in the wrong. Below, you’ll find thefull story, as well as a conversation with the man who posted it.
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Customers often like to “pay it forward” at fast food establishments to provide random acts of kindness to strangers
Image credits:pexels (not the actual photo)
But when one man decided that he wouldn’t keep the chain going, he was immediately met with judgment
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“This act felt very performative”
Image credits:freepik (not the actual photo)
To find out more about this situation, we reached out to the Reddit user who shared this story,. He was kind enough to have a chat withBored Pandaabout whether or not he’s ever participated in these chains before.
“I’ve never been part of a food ‘pay it forward chain’, although it’s not the first time a stranger has paid for my purchase before,” the author shared. “Once, I forgot my wallet, and my kids were crying from hunger, and the lady at the next table said she was done with her pizza and we could finish it. That lady is going to heaven.”
The OP said he’s also been on the receiving end of help in big and small ways throughout his life. “My car was stuck, and a retired trucker helped me get back on the road. I asked, ‘How can I pay you back?’ He laughed and said, ‘Pay it forward! That’s what it’s all about!’ That will stay with me forever.”
Because of that, Ganbario certainly isn’t against showing kindness to strangers. “It ran through my head when the woman in front of me at the grocery store had her credit card declined, and I knew I could give her a little help,” he told Bored Panda. “But this guy at the food cart, this act felt very performative.”
“He put me on the spot and expected me to immediately pay for the person behind me,” he explained. “I didn’t feel like I’d been given a gift so much as an obligation. I shared the story because I was truly unsure at the moment if I had done the right thing – is this a real expectation in our society, like tipping?”
“Pay it forward” chains are often nightmares for employees
Image credits:unsplash (not the actual photo)
In theory, the idea of “paying it forward” in acoffee shopor drive-through sounds lovely. You go out of your way to treat someone else, and in return, they might be inspired to pass along that kindness to another stranger. In reality, however, there are a host of issues that can arise from these sorts of “pay it forward” chains.
Food Republicexplains on their site that it may feel generous to “pay it forward” to another customer, but it’s only making the employees’ lives harder. It forces them to deviate from their routine, which can be stressful when there’s a line out the door or cars wrapped around the building. Many workers would actually prefer if customers just end the chain early on.
Starbucks employees toldTaste of Homethat these kinds of chains are an easy way to cause confusion and get orders mixed up, especially for drive-through lines. At Starbucks in particular, some customers also get annoyed when someone else pays for their order if they had benefits expiring on their app or needed to make the purchase for a promotion.
Plus, if someone is already in line at Starbucks, there’s no question that they can afford the drink that they were about to order. Not to mention the fact thatsomeonehas to break the chain eventually. There’s no reason to drag it out if the end result is the same: only one person gets a free order.
It’s often better to just leave a generous tip for the workers instead
So what is a better alternative to keeping these “pay it forward” chains going? Well, many employees would prefer that customers simply give them a generous tip. In theUnited States, fast food workers earn about$36,749 per year. Meanwhile, the average salary nationwide is$63,795.
Putting a little extra money into the pockets of these hardworking employees is arguably even better than helping out one person who could have afforded their coffee (or popcorn or beer, etc.) already.
And, of course, you can always find creative ways to “pay it forward” inotheraspects of your life as well.GreenLightrecommends buying the meal of a loved one to brighten their day or leaving a kind note on someone’s windshield. It’s also a great idea to volunteer at a local charity or donate blood. You can help an elderly person with their groceries or household chores or tip a service worker extremely generously.
Showing up to your office with homemade baked goods is sure to put a smile on your colleagues, and mentoring a young person in your life might have a huge impact on their future. If you’ve had great experiences at a local business, remember to leave them a heartfelt review and spread the word. And encourage those around you to perform random acts of kindness as well.
The vast majority of readers agreed that the man was under no obligation to keep the chain going
However, a small minority thought that the author was in the wrong
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