Many people want theirproposalto be a surprise, whether they’re the ones kneeling down or those squealing joyfully, saying yes (hopefully).
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It’s not uncommon for people to propose on a romantic dinner date
Image credits:BGStock72 / envato (not the actual photo)
But this guy had no idea that his girlfriend was about to pop the question during his B-Day dinner, and on his behalf, too
Image credits:nikolast1 / envato (not the actual photo)
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It’s a good idea for couples to discuss marriage before anyone pops the question
Image credits:Gera Cejas / pexels (not the actual photo)
According to The Knot Real Weddings Study carried outlast year, close to half of respondents in a serious relationship believe that marriage should be discussed beforesaying ‘I do’; many of them reportedly did and some even went ring shopping together.
“Talking about marriage before the proposal is an excellent idea,” licensed marriage and family therapist Caleb Birkhoff told The Knot. “Though engagements, weddings and marriages are steeped in wonderful tradition this is a great place to break the mold.”
According to the expert, talking about it all doesn’t take the magic out of popping the question, but rather allows the couple to align on feelings, expectations, and visions for the future, which is a great foundation to build arelationshipon.
It’s safe to assume that most people marry out of love (and statistics seem toprove that), but a happy marriage relies on more than that, so discussing everything beforehand can help avoid unexpected—and unfavorable—surprises later in life, after both have said ‘I do’.
Surveys show that most people prefer a private and simple proposal
Image credits:Burst / pexels (not the actual photo)
Even if you discuss engagement and marriage with your partner, it doesn’t mean that the proposal can’t come as a surprise. Thewhensand thehowsdon’t necessarily have to be arranged together; though it might be a good idea to listen to your partner if they ever talk about how they would like to be proposed to.
The reason why listening for clues might come in handy is that not all people favor the same kind of engagement. You wouldn’t take your partner who hates sports to a basketball game to ask them one of the most important questions of your lives; the same way you probably wouldn’t do a grand gesture in some public place if your loved onehatesattention.
According to the survey, women were more likely to want an elaborate proposal than their male counterparts, as were younger people compared to the older generations. Another interesting thing the poll found was that young couples—those aged 18 to 29—were more likely to seriously discuss engagement beforehand than their older counterparts.
But from the OP’s story, it seemed that despite fitting the latter group age wise, they weren’t among those who had the talk, which resulted in the guy being totally blindsided on his birthday. Taken aback, he collected his things and stormed off, splitting people into camps over whether or not he was the jerk for doing so.
Many people sided with the blindsided man, they didn’t think he did anything wrong here
Some, however, weren’t as supportive of his reaction
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