Elitistsare some of the worst people you’ll ever meet. These pompous individuals believe they walk on sacred ground and treat everyone around them like second-class citizens.
Some of these snoots don’t exhibit outrightarrogance, like the woman in today’s story. She showed more of apassive-aggressive attitudetoward her neighbor, whom she pestered for having a “cheaper” car in a “nice community.”
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Some elitists don’t show outright arrogance
Image credits:garetsworkshop / Envato (not the actual photo)
This woman shared an encounter with her neighbor who passive-aggressively told her to move her “cheaper” car away from their “nice community”
Image credits:nicoleturnerbell
Neighbor:Hi, I was trying to pick up my notes.
Woman:What notes?
Neighbor:That I’ve been leaving on your car.
Woman:Oh, is that you?
Neighbor:I just wanted to have a discussion with you about it.
Woman:I thought that you thought that we were a visitor, it’s actually our car.
Neighbor:So are you from welfare or something?
Woman:What do you mean?
Neighbor:I mean, are you on benefits or something? It’s just, we don’t really have cars like that around here.
Woman:No, we bought it for like,£200 pounds actually. We got rid of my old car cause my husband changed his job, so we thought we’d just get a cheaper car so we don’t have to pay overflow.
Neighbor:He’s been struggling to pay? We’re a tight-knit community around here and just, it’s a bit nice, so when I wake up in the morning, we don’t really have cars like that around here, as you can see, we’re quite a nice community. I just wanna talk to you about it. So I was wondering if you could maybe park around the corner. It’s a nice car park. It’s only a short walk down the canal to your house. How would you feel about that?
Woman:Well, no, cause I’ve got two kids, and actually, I do pay road tax, so I actually am entitled.
Neighbor:I completely understand that you pay road tax, it’s just that obviously, we’ve got Range Rovers and, you know, all of the nice cars on the street, and it’s just not really in keeping with the surroundings. It’s quite a nice area, I mean, I’m sure your kids would love to walk down the canal.
Woman:I actually feel quite uncomfortable with you being here. I’m just gonna wait till my husband gets home.
Neighbor:I didn’t wanna make you feel uncomfortable, I just wanted to have a chat about it.
Woman:Sorry, would you mind just stepping back a little bit, please? You’re intimidating me quite a bit.
Neighbor:I mean, you don’t need to feel intimidated, I’m not really here to intimidate you, I’m just here to chat about your car and how it’s really damaging the reputation of our streets.
Woman:I feel like you’re getting quite aggressive now, actually.
Neighbor:I am not getting aggressive. I’m just saying, it’s Halloween, I’m sure if you’ve lived here maybe a while, you might know that we do have visitors on the street. We all get quite in the Halloween spirit, and I don’t really want people thinking that we live near people who are on the breadline and who are struggling. We can help if you want. There’s fundraising that we can do.
Woman:You’re being quite rude now. I’m gonna shut the door.
Neighbor:Oh no.
Here’s the full video of their interaction
The woman posted some follow-ups, including her petty revenge plot
Having a superiority complex is usually a defense mechanism
The woman expressed utter disbelief at what happened because of how absurd and unbelievable the interaction was. But the neighbor she encountered likely had a superiority complex.
Licensed mental health counselorHailey Shafirdefines this behavior as having an overly confident view of themselves and their status. In turn, they may treat others condescendingly and may lack self-awareness of what they are doing.
In an interview withMindBodyGreen, Shafir also noted that having a high-and-mighty attitude may be a defense mechanism to mask deep-seated insecurities, shame, and feelings of inadequacy.
As she explained, the distressing and uncomfortable nature of shame pushes a person to go walls up to “hide these feelings from others, deny them in themselves, and avoid having to experience them.”
According to counseling psychologist and psychotherapistShagoon Maurya, the desire to be in control is one common sign of a person’s superiority complex. These people usually respond with aggression when they feel challenged, or in the case of the woman in the story, passive-aggressiveness.
There must be a balance between empathy and boundaries when dealing with an arrogant person
As Dr. Mosley explained, these people are likely already in “terrible pain” because of theirhidden insecurities. Instead of fighting fire with fire, she suggests “positive mirroring.” In a nutshell, it’s reacting in a way that would not fuel the fire.
Direct communication is also important, according to Malibu-based psychologistDr. Andrea Polard. Her article for Psychology Today emphasizes the importance of reminding the arrogant individual that no one can claim the absolute truth.
Dr. Pollard suggests using “disarming” statements like “Forgive me for interrupting, but…” while discouraging self-suppressing behavior.
“Sometimes, it is advisable to tell the other person how s/he came across,” she wrote.
What do you think? Was there any other appropriate response for the woman?
Commenters offered their suggestions, while some praised the woman for how she handled the situation
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