Blood might be thicker than water, but, even so, sometimes there are lines that should just not be crossed, especially if it involves discrimination.Otheringsomeone just because they have a disability is extremeableistbehavior and not in the least bit respectful of that person’s feelings.
More info:Reddit
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Image credits:Ivan Samkov (not the actual photo)
“I thought it was a joke” said man who couldn’t believe his family’s bad behavior
Image credits:freepik (not the actual photo)
Man’s sister said it’s only reasonable that a brother should always be with his sister during her wedding
Guy’s ableist family claimed he’s done enough for his wife who can’t walk, needs to pay more attention to his siblings
Image credits:throwawayra6769
“If my wife is not invited, then I’m not invited either” ranted unhappy man
What began as acelebratoryfamily dinner, in honor of OP’s older sister’s upcoming wedding, ended with OP threatening his whole family. In the midst of all the dancing, kidding around, drinking and eating, OP’s disabled wife of 8 months got tired, so he took her upstairs to put her to sleep.
When he came back downstairs, however, OP was in for a nasty surprise because, out of the blue, his sister let him know she would prefer it if his wife didn’t come to herwedding. Thinking it was a joke, OP laughed, but his sister made it clear she wasn’t kidding.
OP turned to his dad, who signaled him to just stay calm, but then OP’s mother joined the fray, taking the sides of his siblings and adding that, if his wife was at the wedding, he wouldn’t be able to pay enoughattentionto his brothers and sister.
As OP was going upstairs to collect his wife and leave, his family protested that he was being unreasonable, but he told them he wasn’t in the mood to hear any more out of them.
OP and his wife then left, under the guise of OP’s boss giving him an urgent task for the next morning. His family has since kept accusing him of being in the wrong for threatening them.
From what we can glean from OP’s post, it would definitely seem that his family has been hiding deeply problematic ableist and discriminatory attitudes towards his wife.
According to the Center For Disability Rights,ableismis defined as a set of beliefs or practices that devalue and discriminate against people with physical, intellectual, or psychiatric disabilities, and often rests on the assumption that disabled people need to be ‘fixed’ in one form or another.
Ableism can take many forms, including:
Up to 1 in 4 adults in the United States have some form ofdisability. That’s around 27% of the population. This group includes people with hearing, vision, cognitive, walking, self-care or independent living difficulties. With so many people living with a disability, it’s alarming that more hasn’t been done to secure their rights.
Those with a disabilityearneda median of $28,438 in 2021, compared with $40,948 among those without a disability,according to the Census Bureau. That’s blatant discrimination and should be inexcusable.
TheAmericans with Disabilities Act (ADA)prohibits discrimination against people with disabilities in several areas, including employment, transportation, public accommodations, communications and access to state and local government’ programs and services. As it relates to employment,Title I of the ADAprotects the rights of both employees andjob seekers.
In hisarticlefor Forbes, freelance writer with lifelong disabilities,Andrew Pulrang, writes that two main questions dominate most discussions about ableism. One is about what does and doesn’t “count” as ableism.
The other is about how people with disabilities should or shouldn’t react to ableism. The first is an interesting and sometimes important semantic question. The second is more pragmatic, particularly for disabled folks who actually have to deal with ableism every single day.
The most upvoted comment on Reddit was “NTA Your family sounds toxic af”
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