“I Feel Personally Attacked”: 50 Times People Got Savagely Roasted On The Internet

Some people have such a way with words they can even makeinsultssound good. In reality, you don’t even have to channel your inner Shakespeare to make an insult pleasant to one’s ears. It just has to be clever enough to make the other person want to disappear inside their shell like a turtle.We’re fans of wordplay and justice here atBored Panda, so, we’ve got a collection of the sickest and most inventive burns that people have dished out on the Internet. If you’re looking for inspiration or want to see some cleverly-crafted justice wherejerks got put in their place, check out these clever comebacks!This post may includeaffiliate links.

We’re fans of wordplay and justice here atBored Panda, so, we’ve got a collection of the sickest and most inventive burns that people have dished out on the Internet. If you’re looking for inspiration or want to see some cleverly-crafted justice wherejerks got put in their place, check out these clever comebacks!

This post may includeaffiliate links.

Twitter exchange featuring hilarious clever comebacks about hair color and aposematism.

Two humorous tweets with a clever comeback response.

Hilarious clever comebacks in online discussion about 50s and 60s culture.

Did you think Twitter invented people throwinginsultsat each other in a public space? Well, think again! Back in the olden days, poets would engage in insult rap battles referred to as “flyting.” Today, we can find examples of flyting in classical works such asBeowulfandKing Lear, but other cultures have their versions as well: the Japanese haikai and the Arabic naqa’id.The most famous example of poets giving each other lashings in verbal form would probably be “The Flyting of Dunbar and Kennedie.” That medievalrap battlewas the first instance a poet used an excrement-related joke and also used the now-ubiquitous curse that starts with an F.

The most famous example of poets giving each other lashings in verbal form would probably be “The Flyting of Dunbar and Kennedie.” That medievalrap battlewas the first instance a poet used an excrement-related joke and also used the now-ubiquitous curse that starts with an F.

Men in stylish outfits with a hilarious clever comeback about dryer settings.

Electrical plug labeled male, female with humorous comment; hilarious clever comebacks in text form.

Screenshot of a tweet exchange featuring a clever comeback about appearance statistics.

What was the point of these flytings? Not just to flex the poets' rhyming muscles, if you were wondering. Just like diss tracks today, they could make or break them: the poets' image, honor, and social standing depended on their performance. The poets performed the flyting to the royal court, but people outside the court could read their insults and boost their profiles.Nothing was off-limits during flytings. As Christine M. Robinson writes, Dunbar listed many of Kennedy’s defects: “his highland origins, begging, cowardice, treachery, ugly appearance, venereal disease, jaundice, and sexual activity.” Well, at least he didn’t accuse him ofdownloading PDF files.

Nothing was off-limits during flytings. As Christine M. Robinson writes, Dunbar listed many of Kennedy’s defects: “his highland origins, begging, cowardice, treachery, ugly appearance, venereal disease, jaundice, and sexual activity.” Well, at least he didn’t accuse him ofdownloading PDF files.

Twitter exchange showcasing hilarious clever comebacks between two users about COVID-19 experiences.

Clever comebacks in a Twitter exchange about water and rights.

Tweet shows a pigeon at Delhi airport with a clever comeback telling someone to mind their own business.

Most Old Englishinsultswould be borderline nonsensical today, but we can’t deny they sound pretty fun. Let’s take “Blowsabella,” for example. Yes, it’s an insult towomen, but not what you might’ve thought. It’s a comment on a woman’s hair, most often about how disheveled and unkempt it looked.

Tweet with hilarious and clever comebacks about Netflix emissions and oil executives.

Tweet exchange showcasing hilarious clever comebacks about burger shapes between Cooper Franklin and Wendy’s.

Tweet exchange with a clever comeback on cancel culture and a biblical reference.

Other old insults which might sound like they came straight from a five-year-old’s vocabulary, are Gollumpus and Grumbletonian. And no, they don’t have anything to do withThe Lord of The RingsorWilly Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Gollumpus was a “large, clumsy fellow,” probably originating from the verbgalumph(to move clumsily with a heavy tread). And a Grumbletonian was someone who complained all the time, no matter how good they had it.

Comment section showcasing a clever comeback in a humorous online exchange.

Customer complaint with hilarious clever comeback from restaurant about food delivery issues.

MoonPie and user exchange hilarious clever comebacks about popularity and branding on Twitter.

Not all Old English insults sounded so nonsensical; some were worded quite normally. Like ‘Afternoon Farmer’, used to describe lazy people, perhaps because farmers would rise early and grind through the day. If people wanted to call someone emaciated or skinny like a skeleton, they would call them ‘Death’s Head Upon a Mop Stick.’

A clever comeback about the origins of craft beer in an online discussion.

Comment thread with a clever comeback about flat earth theory and a brain-eating amoeba.

But how can we talk about insults without talking about The Bard himself whoseput-downswere almost second to none? Truly, who else could come up with quips like “froward and unable worms,” “fat guts,” “clay-brained guts,” “luxurious mountain goat,” or “February face”?

Twitter screenshot with a clever comeback about buying and burning books.

Two tweets discussing strict parenting, with a hilarious clever comeback about future nursing home rules.

Twitter thread featuring hilarious clever comebacks about sharing rent and packing bags.

Shakespearean insults aren’t just for name-calling. He was also a master of witty retorts. InHenry IV, Chief Justice tells Falstaff: “You are as a candle, the better burnt out.” Or how about this very politically incorrect observation: “No longer from head to foot than from hip to hip, she is spherical, like a globe; I could find countries in her.”

Text screenshot with a clever comeback about Botox and looking younger.

Tweet exchange featuring hilarious clever comebacks about catfishing with juxtaposed photos.

Twitter exchange featuring hilarious clever comebacks about parenting and privacy expectations.

The reality is that we don’t live in a Shakespeare play. When someone insults us, we spend way too much time thinking of a comeback. A good retort only comes to us when we’re lying in bed at night the following night. Psychologistssaythat’s because the parts of our brains that are responsible for coming up with a witty remark turn off at that moment; they’re sensing a threat.

Twitter exchange featuring clever comebacks: “You asked for something you’ve never heard before."

Twitter post with clever comeback about a rat walking alongside someone.

Two social media posts featuring clever comebacks, with humorous and sarcastic responses.

Psychotherapist Melanie Williams says that “Are you okay?” is the most universal response when someone says something wildly inappropriate to you. “There’s so much packed in this short comeback,” shetold TIME. This flips the attention back at the insulter, not so much what they were talking about. Also, Williams notes, it invites the insulter to self-reflect.

Social media post showcasing hilarious clever comebacks with multiple people agreeing humorously.

Tweet with a humorous response about salmon preparation, highlighting clever comebacks.

Text exchange shows a witty comeback about cooking being intimate, countered by a hilarious retort about solo cooking preference.

PETA tweet followed by clever comeback about Pokemon Go and animal treatment.

Reddit dadjoke with hilarious clever comebacks about a baby’s weight and parenthood humor.

Twitter exchange with hilarious clever comeback about passive income advice.

Tweet conversation with a clever comeback about makeup and video games.

Comment exchange with a clever comeback about steak, featuring a humorous Gordon Ramsay response.

Person smirking with text overlay reading a clever comeback about a Disney prince, showing humor.

Funny auto-reply comeback to a threat, showing a clever response with a faux police warning.

Reddit post showcasing hilarious clever comeback to question about saving something in a house fire.

Woman in a wheelchair delivers a hilarious clever comeback in an online comment.

Two tweets with a hilarious clever comeback about why there are many 23-year-olds, referencing 1999.

Tweet with clever comebacks about emoji use between Tanner and McDonald’s.

Tweet with a hilarious clever comeback, correcting a rhyme by Neil deGrasse Tyson.