Oftentimes, it feels good to be entrusted witha secret. However, there are moments when it can become a burden that pushes you to spill the beans to keep your sanity.The author oftoday’s storyexperienced the latter when a friend confided in her about putting his fiancée’s motherhood skillsto the testusing a pet. Not only was it unfair, but the woman went through a period of misery and exhaustion to prove she was a suitableparent.Feeling conflicted about whether she should divulge the secret, the author asks the Reddit community for advice.RELATED:Keeping a secret can sometimes be burdensomeImage credits:nygi / unsplash (not the actual photo)A woman experienced this difficulty when a male friend confided in her about his fiancéeImage credits:LightFieldStudios / envato (not the actual photo)She later provided her reasons for why she put herself in the situation she was inImage credits:NoLion1030Testing a partner may indicate a lack of trustImage credits:Thirdman / pexels (not the actual photo)Rick’s decision to “test” Amanda’s parenting skills using a pet dog may indicate that he doesn’t trust her enough. This is according to licensed marriage and family therapistLaurel Roberts-Meese, who adds that failing to address this issue may cause these cracks to grow bigger.As these problems worsen, both parties may fall into a deeper pit of doubt and continue to hide things from each other. As psychologistRod MitchelltellsAsk Men, the couple may also engage in a pattern of manipulation or deceit, which he describes as “corrosive” to any romantic relationship.“It establishes an evaluative dynamic where one person becomes the examiner, and the other the examinee, disrupting equality and mutual respect,” Mitchell stated.A relationship that lacks trust is doomed to fail. Certified Gottman TherapistDave Lechnyrbelieves trust is “the foundation upon which all else is built.” Inan article, he describes a trustless commitment as a rudderless ship, “directionless, vulnerable to the tumultuous seas of doubt.”“Without trust, partners are robbed of the chance to experience the depth of true emotional connection, rendering the relationship a shell of what it could potentially be,” he wrote.The author’s concerns about Rick and Amanda’s relationship are valid, especially considering that the latter has struggled withthe “test.”It is also unfair for her to be put through the wringer despite having her boundaries stepped on.In this scenario, it may help if the author told Amanda about what was happening. Whether or not there is a trust issue, the couple needs to address it for the sake of their relationship.Commenters gave their honest takes on the matter as the author gave more informationOthers shared similar experiencesThanks! Check out the results:
Oftentimes, it feels good to be entrusted witha secret. However, there are moments when it can become a burden that pushes you to spill the beans to keep your sanity.
The author oftoday’s storyexperienced the latter when a friend confided in her about putting his fiancée’s motherhood skillsto the testusing a pet. Not only was it unfair, but the woman went through a period of misery and exhaustion to prove she was a suitableparent.
Feeling conflicted about whether she should divulge the secret, the author asks the Reddit community for advice.
RELATED:
Keeping a secret can sometimes be burdensome
Image credits:nygi / unsplash (not the actual photo)
A woman experienced this difficulty when a male friend confided in her about his fiancée
Image credits:LightFieldStudios / envato (not the actual photo)
She later provided her reasons for why she put herself in the situation she was in
Image credits:NoLion1030
Testing a partner may indicate a lack of trust
Image credits:Thirdman / pexels (not the actual photo)
Rick’s decision to “test” Amanda’s parenting skills using a pet dog may indicate that he doesn’t trust her enough. This is according to licensed marriage and family therapistLaurel Roberts-Meese, who adds that failing to address this issue may cause these cracks to grow bigger.
As these problems worsen, both parties may fall into a deeper pit of doubt and continue to hide things from each other. As psychologistRod MitchelltellsAsk Men, the couple may also engage in a pattern of manipulation or deceit, which he describes as “corrosive” to any romantic relationship.
“It establishes an evaluative dynamic where one person becomes the examiner, and the other the examinee, disrupting equality and mutual respect,” Mitchell stated.
A relationship that lacks trust is doomed to fail. Certified Gottman TherapistDave Lechnyrbelieves trust is “the foundation upon which all else is built.” Inan article, he describes a trustless commitment as a rudderless ship, “directionless, vulnerable to the tumultuous seas of doubt.”
“Without trust, partners are robbed of the chance to experience the depth of true emotional connection, rendering the relationship a shell of what it could potentially be,” he wrote.
The author’s concerns about Rick and Amanda’s relationship are valid, especially considering that the latter has struggled withthe “test.”It is also unfair for her to be put through the wringer despite having her boundaries stepped on.
In this scenario, it may help if the author told Amanda about what was happening. Whether or not there is a trust issue, the couple needs to address it for the sake of their relationship.
Commenters gave their honest takes on the matter as the author gave more information
Others shared similar experiences
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