Roses are red, Violets are blue, Anti-Valentine’s Day? Count me in, boo-hoo! While Valentine’s Day is often associated with romance and couple celebrations, many single individuals find creative and fulfilling ways to mark the (let’s face it) ultra-commercial occasion.Some opt for “Galentine’s Day” or “Broentine’s Day” gatherings with friends, where they exchange small gifts, share laughter, and celebrate the bonds of friendship. Others choose to indulge in self-care rituals, treating themselves to spa days, solo adventures, or indulgent meals.But a handful of separate individuals seek revenge, such as donating to a charity in order to havea feral cat named after an exbefore it gets neutered.Believe it or not, there are plenty more ways of humorously getting petty for the celebration of love.Bored Pandalooks at some of the funniest anti-Valentine’s Day promotions.This post may includeaffiliate links.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Anti-Valentine’s Day? Count me in, boo-hoo! While Valentine’s Day is often associated with romance and couple celebrations, many single individuals find creative and fulfilling ways to mark the (let’s face it) ultra-commercial occasion.
Some opt for “Galentine’s Day” or “Broentine’s Day” gatherings with friends, where they exchange small gifts, share laughter, and celebrate the bonds of friendship. Others choose to indulge in self-care rituals, treating themselves to spa days, solo adventures, or indulgent meals.
But a handful of separate individuals seek revenge, such as donating to a charity in order to havea feral cat named after an exbefore it gets neutered.
Believe it or not, there are plenty more ways of humorously getting petty for the celebration of love.Bored Pandalooks at some of the funniest anti-Valentine’s Day promotions.
This post may includeaffiliate links.
Who Gives A Crap, a company that makes recycled toilet paper from bamboo has come back with its “Flush Your Ex” campaign after “popular demands,” it stated in anofficial release.“We’re once again turning your ex’s empty promises into something useful this Valentine’s Day: 100% recycled toilet paper!” the company wrote.Customers are invited to mail leftover love letters “taking up psychic space in your sock drawer” to the company’s production facilities, “where we magically transform their BS into TP.”The company added: “Because nothing says closure like knowing that someone, somewhere, is putting those sweet nothings exactly where they belong.”
The Brookfield Zoois once again offering you the chance to name a cockroach in honor of that un-special (or special) someone in your life.You can name a Madagascar hissing cockroach after your ex (or anyone) for Valentine’s Day with a $15 donation that supports the zoo.You’ll receive a Certificate of Naming in your donation receipt that you can fill out and share or hang on your wall as a reminder that a cockroach now bears that name.You’ll still receive placement on the Cockroach Naming Board posted outside of the Hamill Family Play Zoo, located in Illinois, USA.
The Daily Dish, a restaurant located in Silver Spring, Maryland, USA, will be offering a special à la carte Anti-Valentine’s Day menu, encouraging singles to “dive into an anti-Valentine’s Day rebellion with these bites and cocktails that defiantly untangle the conventional love narratives.”The venue has prepared some hilariously-named cocktails for the occasion, including a “Wasn’t Mint To Be,” a “Sex on the Beach… For One,” a “Crying Cupid Cosmo,” and a “Your Relationship On the Rocks.”Additionally, hungry uncoupled individuals will be able to indulge in a plate of “Untie The Knot,” consisting of garlic knots, or try the “Block The Ex” dish (bacon-wrapped scallop), as well as the “Not-Your-Fairytale Pumpkin,” made of beet with pumpkin crostata.
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Asian-fusion cuisine restaurant chain P.F. Chang has planned to transform Valentine’s breakup tears into triumphant cheers for the freedom of single life.“A breakup text is now the golden ticket to free DUMPlings* at P.F. Chang’s this month as the brand unveils a new program that spreads a little joy through a free six count of dumplings for the broken-hearted,” the chain wrote in apress release.While P.F. Chang hosts many couples for Valentine’s dates, the brand wants to treat fans who are in need of some heartbreak comfort food, the company revealed.P.F. Chang went on to encourage new singles to text the chain with CHANGSDUMPLINGS and their breakup story or screenshot to receive instructions for redeeming a six-count of shrimp or pork dumplings in a restaurant or via delivery.
This Valentine’s Day season, bakery chain Insomnia Cookies is offering a breakup box of cookies called the “It’s not you, it’s me” pack, as perNation’s Restaurant News.This customizable 12-pack of cookies allows the heartbreaker to pick from one of four messages to send to their soon-to-be ex-sweetheart, ranging from “It’s not me, it’s you” to “I have the hots for your roommate” and the creatively cookie-themed “you’re sweet but not my flavor.”Customers can choose to stuff the box with classic Insomnia Cookies or go with the Valentine’s Day-themed ‘Red Velvet Cookies ‘n Cream Brookie’ for an upcharge.
TheAmerican Writers Museuminvites love skeptics, heartbreak survivors, and those who have had enough of Cupid’s arrows to rejoice and join them for a night of unapologetic revelry and celebration at an event called Get Lit: Down With Love.There, people can take part in the Rejection Open Mic and share rejection letters or stories of their own. After the reading, individuals can shred the letter and release it into the ether.The museum also encourages people to create hilariously sarcastic, anti-love cards for their friends (or enemies) at the Un-Valentine’s Day Card Station. “We’ll even mail them out for you (for a small fee),” the institution wrote in a press release.People can unleash their creative energy at the Shatter Your Sorrows station, where they can decorate a plate with vibrant expressions of their emotions before ceremoniously shattering it in the love-themed pop-up rage room.The museum also offers a game where you can test your aim at Cupid’s Precision Payback and see if you can hit Cupid as he flies around the museum.
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Greta Jaruševičiūtė
Ilona Baliūnaitė
Mindaugas Balčiauskas
Funny
