Personal space is a sacred thing. Only you get to decide who to let into it, what you’re fine with, and what’s too close for comfort. If your physical boundaries are being crossed, you have every right to assert them and, if need be, defend them.
For one Redditor, things got extreme after a guystalkedher in a grocery store, following her out to the parking lot and right up to her car. After letting him know he was making her uncomfortable, she eventually lashed out at him. Now she’s asking netizens if she was a jerk for doing so.
More info:Reddit
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Woman was innocently shopping at a grocery store when she noticed a middle-aged guy following her quite closely
Image credits:ASphotofamily / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The man wasn’t picking up or looking at anything, and didn’t even have a cart
Image credits:Oleksandr P / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Feeling uncomfortable, the woman checked out, but he followed her to her car and tried to flirt with her
Image credits:u/DahliaFlower667
The woman let him know that she wasn’t interested and told him to get out of her personal space, but he just got closer, so she broke his nose and took off
It wasn’t until she got to her car that she noticed the man had followed her all the way and was starting to make awkward small talk, asking her random questions like where she’s from, whether she has a boyfriend or not, and all the rest.
The woman told him in no uncertain terms that she wasn’t interested and asked him to back off, but he just got closer. OP describes having had some previous trauma that makes her extremely uncomfortable with others in her personal space, so it was no surprise when she lashed out at the creep, breaking his nose in the process.
OP goes on to say that the guy started yelling at her but that, panicked, she just wanted to get out of there, so she got in her car and made a speedy getaway. While her friends expressed polarized opinions on what happened, she turned to Reddit to ask if she was a jerk for how she handled the situation.
The woman says that she was wearing a dress, since it was hot that day, but that’s no excuse for the man’s lecherous advances. But what does the law say about her decisive action?
Image credits:freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
According to the FindLawwebsite, self-defense is using force or violence to protect oneself, or a third person, from imminent harm. In other words, the victim reasonably believes they are in immediate danger of imminent death, bodily injury, or serious bodily harm.
Self-defense law is morecomplicatedthan you might think. To deal with the many circumstances under which self-defense occurs, states have created rules to determine instances when self-defense is permitted. These rules also define how much force a victim can use to protect themselves.
To determine whether or not self-defense is justified, certain legal questions need to be asked and answered. For instance, was the threat imminent? Was the fear of harm reasonable? Was it a proportional response, and was there a duty to retreat before taking self-defensive action?
Stand-your-ground laws are unique in thefactthat they don’t require the person in danger to retreat before they take defensive (and even lethal) action against the attacker.
On the RightToBewebsite, community organizer and activist Jessica Raven says, “We live with the threat that 1 in 5 women will be assaulted in her lifetime. We all experience harassment on a daily basis, afraid that our action or inaction will escalate the situation to a more severe form of gender-based violence.”
Then there’s always documenting the situation. Your phone is your best friend, so, if you feel safe doing so, whip it out and start filming your harasser. If you can film them in action, you can even upload it to social media to name and shame them. You’ll also have evidence if harassment turns to something more serious, like stalking, and you need to get the law involved.
Bored Pandacaught up with OP to ask her a few questions. When we asked her whether or not she was surprised to see her post get so much attention, she had this to say, “Absolutely, it came to me as quite the shock considering most of my posts do NOT blow up like this.”
Finally, we asked her if there’d been any developments since she first posted her story and she had this to share, “I did contact the police after the incident, gave them a description of the man and said the location, but they told me that there was very little they can do other than look for the man, but they never did find him.”
Image credits:artursafronovvvv / Freepik (not the actual photo)
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