In a candid post from a few days ago, the guy explained that the ceremony he and his wife were invited to would cost them thousands of dollars to attend, and that’s not something they want to spend so much money on. Which is a shame because he really wants to be there for the couple.

However, the more he looks at the financial spreadsheets, the less sense they make.

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Every couple has the right to have the wedding ceremony that they want

“Close-up of a bride holding a ‘Save the Date’ card in her hands, related to destination wedding struggles.

Image credits:Leeloo The First/ Pexels (not the actual photo)

However, this groomsman believes that his friend is asking too much of him

Man in striped shirt counting money, writing in notebook, highlighting cost concerns for a destination wedding.

Image credits:Kaboompics.com / Pexels (not the actual photo)

Groomsman looking concerned, resting his chin on hands, contemplating destination wedding expenses.

Image credits:Nathan Dumlao / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

Image credits:Narrow-Guitar-4497

Wedding ceremony in a church, bride in a lace gown and groom at the altar, surrounded by guests.

Image credits:George Chambers / Pexels (not the actual photo)

Weddings are getting more expensive to attend

Based on astudyof 1,000 guests who have been to at least one wedding in person in 2023, the average cost per attendance was $580, an increase of $120 compared to 2021.

Of course, the figure fluctuates depending on the location, the type of wedding, the guest’s relation to the couple, and other factors.

For context, the average guest spent $250 to attend a wedding in their hometown (that didn’t require travel or lodging), and the average cost to attend a destination wedding for those who drove out of town was approximately $680.

However, the ceremony our Redditor was invited to is definitely on the expensive side because guests who flew to attend a wedding reported the average cost of the trip to be around $1,600.

His concerns are perfectly understandable. The study also discovered that 85% of respondents viewed price as the most important feature when deciding where to book their accommodations. Of the 63% who paid for accommodations, just over half stayed in a hotel, while 16% booked a vacation rental (like Airbnb or VRBO), and 8% chose to stay in a traditional bed-and-breakfast or inn.

When you already need to dress up, find the right gift, and put aside time to attend a wedding, dishing thousands of additional dollars just to get there is certainly something only a few of us can afford (or want).

The entry fee for those who choose not to stay at the couple’s recommended hotel isn’t winning anyone over, either.

Matthew Shaw, the founder of Sauveur, a wedding planning company in London,saysthat selling tickets “introduces a strange relationship between you and your guests, turning your guests into customers.”

He adds, “You’re no longer hosting — you’re offering them a paid experience, which introduces a very different narrative in terms of what guests are expecting.”

As the story went viral, people expressed their support for the groomsman and said he’s definitely entitled to refuse to go

Reddit comment exchange about groomsman concerns over affording a destination wedding fee.

Groomsman struggles with expensive destination wedding costs, questioning high expenses for guests.

Text from Reddit about groomsman unable to afford destination wedding costs at “Casa Bonita.

Text discussing challenges of affording destination weddings for groomsmen, highlighting financial burdens and guest choices.

Text screenshot discussing wedding costs and groomsman’s affordability struggles.

Text message conversation about a groomsman struggling to afford a destination wedding.

Text critique of expensive destination wedding burden on groomsmen.

Comment discussing groomsman struggles at an expensive destination wedding.

Reddit comment discussing groomsman struggle with affording a destination wedding.

Comment criticizing destination weddings for high costs, mentioning groomsmen struggles to afford attending.

Comment offering advice about financial concerns with a destination wedding, suggesting honesty with the groomsman.

Comment discussing an alternative plan due to groomsman struggles affording a destination wedding.

Text discussing groomsman struggles to afford destination wedding costs and suggesting to say no to demands.

Reddit comment discussing groomsman financial struggles with destination wedding costs.

Text discussing groomsman struggles with affording a destination wedding and the pressure from the bride and groom.

Text explaining why a groomsman struggles to afford attending a destination wedding.

Comment discussing financial regrets related to a costly event, highlighting groomsman’s struggles with destination wedding costs.

Comment discussing affordability concerns for groomsman at a destination wedding.

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