As writer Robin Marantz Henigpointed out, sometimes it seems that grandparentscan’t help but overstep their adult children’s boundaries. Whether it’s due to a sincere belief that they know more or resistance to the fact that they’ve aged out of the cherished role of family decision-maker, the result can be fraught encounters that can break a relationship.
Image credits:Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
Luckily, she found a way to send a message to the lady that she couldn’t ignore
Image source:MoosieMusings
Vicki Broadbent ofHonest Mumthinks parents have to be aware of the way they give and receive advice
Image credits:Honest Mum
“Being empathetic, gentle, and non-judgemental when providing parental advice, particularly unsolicited ones, is key,” Broadbent, who can also be found on Instagram as@honestmum, toldBored Panda. “Positioning yourself as being open and there to help and/or answer questions will allow the parent to trust you and let you in.”
When the lady said that she “hated” the names her daughter had picked for her child and that she would outright refuse to use them, she had already set a bad tone for the entire conversation. Instead, she could’ve, for example, asked why the couple liked those particular names.
“Asking questions and discovering more on the ‘why’ behind people’s parenting styles and concerns will assist you on how best to provide advice and support,” said Vicki Broadbent, the author ofMumboss(UK) andThe Working Mom(US and Canada). “Reflecting on your own perceived challenges will help you to come across as relatable. We all tend to switch off when someone takes on the superior know-it-all position!”
When moms and dads want to reinforce boundaries with their own folks without damaging the relationship, Broadbent believes thoughtful honesty is the way to go. This means “being open but also considerate when it comes to how you explore discussions so as not to hurt feelings. Understanding why your parents might behave a certain way or feel defensive about topics will allow you to approach problems gently but in a way to problem-solve rather than aggravate,” the mom-of-three added.
“Each generation of parents is trying to improve on the last. That is the evolution of parenting!”
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