Milwaukee, Wisconsin:
It was the best of times, it was the wurst of times. One minute I’m high-fiving cheering people in the stands, and the next thing I know I’m a bum. Ah, the life of an athlete – or at least one wearing a giant foam costume for a day.
With one out in the top of the sixth, I donned my “Frank,” the Hot Dog outfit. The other four runners got ready too. “Bret,” the Bratwurst wearing lederhosen, the natty “Posh” the Polish Dog in sunglasses; “Guido,” the Italian Sausage with a Chef’s hat; and the newest – “Cinco,” Chorizo wearing a gigantic sombrero. Frank looked like an All American baseball player, with his toothy smile and eye black. The costume isn’t heavy, maybe six or seven pounds, but bulky, about six feet tall. I dove in, popped my arms through the armholes, and placed the inner harness on my shoulders – and that was it. Now the top of “my” head was about 11 feet in the air. You see through a mesh screen in the character’s chest. I paced around like a caged animal, nervous but ready to run for all the mustard.
Everybody has a Favorite Sausage Character:
Michael Hurtz, a tall theology student from Milwaukee wearing a Loyola U Volleyball sweatshirt said, “I like the Bratwurst because my whole family is German. It’s fun and all about Milwaukee – beer and sausages.” He’s right of course. Milwaukee, this hearty Midwestern city of 600,000 is all about beer and sausages, and people consume plenty of each, with relish. Favorite beer joints include the Lakefront Brewery (The Animal House of Breweries), Sprecher, and the Milwaukee Ale House among others. Beer, brats, dogs, and sausages seem to be in the local blood. Area kids eagerly root for their favorite Racing Sausage. “I like Posh, the Polish, and I also like Rowdy Tellez,” said 12-year-old Aaron Fammgez from Oconomowoc. “I like the Chorizo, he’s Mexican,” said Evan Loker, aged 10, from Madison. “The Chef is my favorite,” said 11-year-old Christy Stumpf of Sherwood, Wisconsin with a smile. “I like the Hot Dog – he’s the underdog,” said local 9-year-old fan, Justin Meyer sitting with his family. Bonnie Johnson works behind the counter at the ballpark’s Brat Express, selling tasty Brats and Chorizo for $4.25. “I tell ya – that Chorizo is always dogging it, he’s an underachiever,” she said.
“Which one is number 3?” asked Cindy Brandenburg from Wausau. “The Italian? Guido – yeah, I like him,” she said. “We have a stuffed Guido in our RV.” Brandenburg and her five kids had spots in a special bar section over the right field fence. When asked about the famous Sausages even venerable Brewers announcer Bob Uecker had an opinion. He laughed and said, “I eat them.”
That night, the American Family Field throng, packed with Brewers’ and interstate rival Minnesota Twins’ fans enjoyed a spirited ballgame. Although local slugger Christian Yelich hit one out late, the home team lost; buzzing Twins fans and accepting Brewers faithful all seemed content. It was time to be one with the Milwaukee locals and find a fresh cold beer. Yet my thighs were still burning from my doomed race and stimulation mixed with shame, 50-50. They say that every dog has his day, but alas, this was not mine. This Sausage had left the building.
Bob Ecker is a writer living in Napa, California
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