Some people choose to have children even if they cannot fulfill the responsibilities ofparenthood. What they fail to realize is the hurt and possibletrauma they are causingto their offspring, who do not deserve to carry such a lifelong burden.
The authorexpressed her disappointment to her father but did not get a response. She is also wondering if she was wrong for telling him off.
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Some people are not fit to be parents, and they only cause lifelong trauma to their children
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She expressed her disappointment and received no response but questioned whether she was wrong for doing so
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Absentee fathers can damage their daughters emotionally, socially, and psychologically
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Although the author has yet to reach adulthood, at 17, she has already borne the brunt of her father’s absence. She has shown some signs of abandonment feelings, which is one of the psychological effects, according to author and academicDr. Donna L. Roberts.
In an article forMedium, Dr. Roberts mentioned other possible mental drawbacks, such as depression, anxiety, a lack of confidence, and the inability to establish healthy relationships.
Young women who grew up without their fathers may also engage in risky behaviors. Dr. Roberts mentioned vices like alcohol and drugs, as well as promiscuous behavior at a young age, as potential outcomes.
Going no contact may be the better option with an absentee parent
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The author experienced constant disappointment from her absentee father and has contemplated going no contact. She may even be resigned and at peace with the idea of not having him around.
According to author and clinical psychologistDr. Lindsay Gibson, being aware of the mistreatment and dysfunctionality is one sign to cut ties with a parent.
“Sometimes, our internal growth makes it so that we really can no longer tolerate things that we used to not be even aware of,” Dr. Gibson toldBusiness Insiderin an interview.
The author’s continuous letdowns are also good reasons to avoid contact. According to psychology professorDr. Leslie Halpern, there is no point in maintaining hurtful relationships.
“Recognizing that spending time apart from them is important to one’s own mental health,” Dr. Halpern toldParents.com.
Family estrangement can be harsh for some people, and it seems that way for the author. But if necessary, she may need to take such measures.
Evaluating what kind of relationship she wants with her father is a good first step. As licensed family counselorAndrew Roffmanpoints out, familial relationships will continue on an emotional level, albeit inactively. In such cases, limited interactions may be another option.
The author says she is open to having a relationship with her dad despite all thepain he causedher.
However, it may be helpful for her to assess how present she wants her father to be. She has been through enough and owes it to herself to find peace and happiness, with or without him in her life.
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