While some jobs out there are downright horrible, abusive and deserve to be lost and forgotten, the sad reality is that many workplaces only show their true colors later. So it can be helpful to know some danger signs.
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Red flag people in the workplace number 1: you know that person in a leadership position that shows one face to other people in leadership, people at or above their own level, and a completely different face to the people who report to them or who are really anywhere below them in the hierarchy. This type of person can be especially dangerous for a company culture because they’re sneaky. It really takes a while to catch them, if they’re ever caught, because they’re very strategically presenting one face to the people at their own level. Be very guarded with these people. This is a red flag in the workplace and really any other area of life. Someone who feels really comfortable treating people they perceive to be below them poorly. This is not a respectful person. This is not a person with a lot of ethical integrity. And even if they don’t treat you poorly now, as soon as you stop being useful to them, you will also be the object of that treatment.
Bored Pandagot in touch withMarissa Moyerwho made the videos you see here and she was kind enough to share her thoughts. Given the popularity of the series, we wanted to know why she thought so many people resonated with it.
“Workers are demanding more emotional intelligence than ever before from their leaders and workplace cultures. They want to work for companies that treat them like “whole humans”—individuals who not only work but also have families, interests, and lives outside of work, unique personalities, and emotional needs. They want work to be a safe place mentally and emotionally.”
Red flag people in the workplace number 3: you know that co-worker that’s on the same level as you but thinks they have authority over you. They may check your work and try to boss you around. We all know this is annoying. That’s not the red flag. There’s a point where this behavior goes beyond being a little difficult or overbearing, and that’s what I want to talk to you about because there is a name for it. Just for the record, as a people skills and influence coach, I have a lot of empathy for difficult people at work. We all have issues but it is not your job to try to change these people. It’s literally mine. You just need to protect yourself. But let’s talk about how to recognize a scriptwriter at work. This is a person who has written a certain script or story in their head about you, about their leadership, about situations at work, and they are always the victim. A red flag that you, as a co-worker, need to look out for is, are they spending a crazy amount of their time collecting evidence on you, receipts of your failures or wrongdoing? Are they practically writing dossiers about you trying to prove to leadership that you are the problem, regardless of how much evidence there is to the contrary? Do they constantly express that you are out to ‘get them’ when you literally couldn’t care less and you were just trying to do your job? If so, you could be dealing with a scriptwriter, and if you are, you are not going to change this person, you can and should set boundaries over and over and over again. But it’s likely not going to stop their behavior. You have to document everything this person does to you and escalate this to your leadership, to HR, whatever your company’s processes is. I am not an HR person and this is not HR advice
On paper, much of this advice makes a lot of sense. Some might even see it as commonplace. However, as stated before the popularity of the content does indicate that many people find it useful, so we were curious to hear her take on why some folks really struggle with spotting red flags. “Honestly, most people grew up with some level of trauma or fear of people in authority positions that makes it very hard for them to question patterns or behaviors that they think are wrong. They may even believe that harmful behaviors are normal. Many companies allow, implicitly or explicitly, these things to continue happening, and people feel too small or afraid to do anything about it,” she shared. Unfortunately, this can even go beyond being a side effect of a hierarchical company and stem from “fear” being seen as a legitimate strategyin some organizations.“Cultures are self-sustaining, and the problem is that even people in leadership who see a negative pattern often feel too small or afraid to call out harmful patterns or people. A good resource for people who are in situations where they feel like they need HR advice, but don’t trust the HR department at their company, is Caged Bird HR. They are culturally competent independent HR experts. This means they can give you unbiased HR guidance that is in Your best interest—not your company’s because they are not connected to your company in any way.”
On paper, much of this advice makes a lot of sense. Some might even see it as commonplace. However, as stated before the popularity of the content does indicate that many people find it useful, so we were curious to hear her take on why some folks really struggle with spotting red flags. “Honestly, most people grew up with some level of trauma or fear of people in authority positions that makes it very hard for them to question patterns or behaviors that they think are wrong. They may even believe that harmful behaviors are normal. Many companies allow, implicitly or explicitly, these things to continue happening, and people feel too small or afraid to do anything about it,” she shared. Unfortunately, this can even go beyond being a side effect of a hierarchical company and stem from “fear” being seen as a legitimate strategyin some organizations.
“Cultures are self-sustaining, and the problem is that even people in leadership who see a negative pattern often feel too small or afraid to call out harmful patterns or people. A good resource for people who are in situations where they feel like they need HR advice, but don’t trust the HR department at their company, is Caged Bird HR. They are culturally competent independent HR experts. This means they can give you unbiased HR guidance that is in Your best interest—not your company’s because they are not connected to your company in any way.”
Red flag people in the workplace number 8: here’s how to tell if a senior leader is in a tailspin. I’m not saying this to be a jerk. But the truth is that everyone else at the company suffers so much, when a senior leader does this, and I have seen this at least three times in my career. When a senior leader starts fixating on things that are so unimportant, so far removed from anything that is in the realm of the company’s priorities, you’re just sitting here waiting for all of the stuff that they’re actually supposed to be doing. And they’re like, obsessing over whether or not the office dishwasher is working, or they spent an entire day trying to sync some random calendar on Outlook, or they’ve decided that the art on the wall of some conference room has just gotta go, we gotta do something about it. That is the level of not important I’m talking about, and just about every single day, they say that the huge company-level priorities that they’re supposed to be working on, are almost done. They are not doing well. They have realized that they are incompetent and they cannot handle this role. They are desperately reaching for any way to look frazzled and busy so that they can continue ignoring their priorities. If you see someone going through this and you care about them, reach out and ask them if they are okay. If not, just know that they’re probably on their way out of the company anyway.
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To perhaps not end on such a dour note, we wanted Marissa to share some “green flags,” positive indicators one might find a company. “One of the safest behaviors you can witness in work environments is when it is ok to question things. If you are not allowed to question anything in your environment, this is cult-like behavior.”“A healthy culture is not afraid of that. Along those same lines, when people in leadership positions can admit to setbacks, mistakes, and failures—and then make a plan to address them, and actually follow through—this is a huge green flag. No workplace is perfect! A safe workplace is not one that doesn’t have problems or problematic people—it’s about how they handle it. Do they take action within a reasonable timeframe? Do they take steps to protect employees from any further harm? Do they have a growth mindset? Are they transparent when they can’t do anything about a problem at this time?”
To perhaps not end on such a dour note, we wanted Marissa to share some “green flags,” positive indicators one might find a company. “One of the safest behaviors you can witness in work environments is when it is ok to question things. If you are not allowed to question anything in your environment, this is cult-like behavior.”
“A healthy culture is not afraid of that. Along those same lines, when people in leadership positions can admit to setbacks, mistakes, and failures—and then make a plan to address them, and actually follow through—this is a huge green flag. No workplace is perfect! A safe workplace is not one that doesn’t have problems or problematic people—it’s about how they handle it. Do they take action within a reasonable timeframe? Do they take steps to protect employees from any further harm? Do they have a growth mindset? Are they transparent when they can’t do anything about a problem at this time?”
Red flag people in the workplace number 5: you will suffer more from this if the person doing it is in leadership over you, but this applies to anyone in the workplace. Okay, so there are, of course, people in the workplace who are so afraid of showing any vulnerability whatsoever that they will deflect and hide and lie, in order to avoid having to admit to any mistake whatsoever. But something more subtle I’ve seen from that type of person is that they will actually make a huge show of admitting to tiny, completely insignificant, no one gives a cr*p mistakes so that they can then point to those incidents and be like, ‘Look, see, I own up to s**t?’ Example, ‘Hey, you know that unimportant completely innocuous email that I sent? I was supposed to send it to John Doe, but I accidentally sent it to John Deer. Accountability is so important. I apologize’. Of course, this is a very thin offense, and just know that if you do this, pretty much everyone sees right through it.
“Don’t expect perfection, expect a reasonable amount of honesty and transparency that treats you as an employee with a level of real respect. Leadership can’t always be 100% transparent, but they can give you enough to make you know that they actually give a shit,” she shared. If you want to find more of her work, you can check out herTikTokorLinkedInpage.
Image credits:themarissamoyerImage credits:themarissamoyerImage credits:themarissamoyerViewers shared their thoughts on workplace red flags
Image credits:themarissamoyer
Viewers shared their thoughts on workplace red flags
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