Just because someone is your biologicalparentdoesn’t automatically make them family. Being a father is all about self-sacrifice, supporting your kids through all the ups and downs, and loving them unconditionally.Unfortunately, not everyone fits the bill. Some dads are downrighttoxicand deeply mean-spirited.Bored Pandahas collected some of the most awful message exchanges that people have ever had with their ‘dads.’ They’re examples of behavior that nobody should have to tolerate, and why healthy boundaries are vital, even when it comes to your relatives.Warning: this topic may be triggering for some readers.This post may includeaffiliate links.
Just because someone is your biologicalparentdoesn’t automatically make them family. Being a father is all about self-sacrifice, supporting your kids through all the ups and downs, and loving them unconditionally.Unfortunately, not everyone fits the bill. Some dads are downrighttoxicand deeply mean-spirited.Bored Pandahas collected some of the most awful message exchanges that people have ever had with their ‘dads.’ They’re examples of behavior that nobody should have to tolerate, and why healthy boundaries are vital, even when it comes to your relatives.Warning: this topic may be triggering for some readers.
This post may includeaffiliate links.
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I went to Goodwill and bought it back for $85. They had my computer for sale for $85.
Parenting is a very difficult and sensitive topic to get into. Nearly everyone seems to have strong opinions on raising kids well (and might think others are wrong). There’s no single ‘best’ approach to childcare because a lot depends on the dynamics between your family members.But broadly speaking, one parenting style ismiles betterthan the alternatives. Spoiler warning: it’s authoritative (not to be confused with authoritarian) parenting.
Parenting is a very difficult and sensitive topic to get into. Nearly everyone seems to have strong opinions on raising kids well (and might think others are wrong). There’s no single ‘best’ approach to childcare because a lot depends on the dynamics between your family members.
But broadly speaking, one parenting style ismiles betterthan the alternatives. Spoiler warning: it’s authoritative (not to be confused with authoritarian) parenting.
There arefour mainparenting styles: authoritative (aka balanced), authoritarian (dictatorial and harsh), permissive (parents see their kids as friends), and uninvolved (neglectful).To put it bluntly, you should aim to be anauthoritative parentbecause it’s the healthiest for your children when it comes to building self-esteem, resilience, academic success, and emotional and mental well-being.
There arefour mainparenting styles: authoritative (aka balanced), authoritarian (dictatorial and harsh), permissive (parents see their kids as friends), and uninvolved (neglectful).
To put it bluntly, you should aim to be anauthoritative parentbecause it’s the healthiest for your children when it comes to building self-esteem, resilience, academic success, and emotional and mental well-being.
Your goal as a parent is to create a nurturing and supportive space for your munchkins, where they can not only survive but also thrive and grow into kind, capable, and confident adults.
They establish very clear guidelines for their kids: they explain what behavior is acceptable, what’s not, and why. And they take their children’s feelings and opinions into account.
That was yesterday morning. Since then, I’ve been getting complete silent treatment and he snaps at my mom and brother whenever they try to speak to him.
These authoritative parents are calm. They’re assertive. They genuinely care about their emotional well-being, but they don’t shy away from setting expectations and rules, too.It’s important to remember, though, that there is no such thing as a ‘perfect’ parent. No matter what your social media feeds and random parenting blog posts tell you, all parents make mistakes from time to time. And that’s okay.
These authoritative parents are calm. They’re assertive. They genuinely care about their emotional well-being, but they don’t shy away from setting expectations and rules, too.
It’s important to remember, though, that there is no such thing as a ‘perfect’ parent. No matter what your social media feeds and random parenting blog posts tell you, all parents make mistakes from time to time. And that’s okay.
Previously he disowned me for marrying a woman, he also said he had stopped drinking, which wasn’t true. I must also mention that he’s been an absent father and an addict my entire life.
About three years ago, my father cheated on my mother after 31 years of marriage. When my sister and I refused to accept the “other woman” as our new stepmom, he flipped out and cut us off because we hurt her feelings. Over the last three years, he has made no steps to apologize and has done irreparable damage to our relationship. He was constantly sending guilt-tripping texts like this to us, and I finally just snapped and blocked him after this.
Parenting isn’t a competition. And you’re not aiming for a ‘perfect’ track record. Instead, you should focus on being there for your kids, guiding them as best as you can, and learning from your mistakes as you go along.Your success as a parent depends on your kids’ happiness rather than doing things ‘perfectly,’ following the latest parenting trends, and taking influencers’ tips as gospel. Don’t give in to the pressure from social media and your local neighborhood parents to behave a certain way just because it’s popular.
Parenting isn’t a competition. And you’re not aiming for a ‘perfect’ track record. Instead, you should focus on being there for your kids, guiding them as best as you can, and learning from your mistakes as you go along.
Your success as a parent depends on your kids’ happiness rather than doing things ‘perfectly,’ following the latest parenting trends, and taking influencers’ tips as gospel. Don’t give in to the pressure from social media and your local neighborhood parents to behave a certain way just because it’s popular.
For context, my sister and I are very low contact with our father. There was a small news article about my participation in a space mission and he is upset the journalist didn’t credit him for my interest in space.
He’s taken 1000$ out of my brother’s account for eating a Laffy Taffy, so this is actually pretty tame compared to other stuff.
Contrary to authoritative parents,authoritarianparents often don’t care about their kids’ thoughts or feelings about their decisions. They don’t allow for much (if any) room for negotiations and compromise. They simply expect their kids to follow their commands and strict rules to the letter, no matter the context.
Meanwhile, permissive parents, unlike authoritarians, tend to have very few expectations for their children. They can be kind, warm, and nurturing, but they’re not the best when it comes to setting up and enforcing rules and boundaries inside and outside of the home.Often, permissive parents see their kids as their friends, so they rarely discipline them. This, in turn, can lead to their munchkins developing lots of unhealthy habits, which will have a knock-on effect on their health later in life.
Meanwhile, permissive parents, unlike authoritarians, tend to have very few expectations for their children. They can be kind, warm, and nurturing, but they’re not the best when it comes to setting up and enforcing rules and boundaries inside and outside of the home.
Often, permissive parents see their kids as their friends, so they rarely discipline them. This, in turn, can lead to their munchkins developing lots of unhealthy habits, which will have a knock-on effect on their health later in life.
Freedom is good. But too much freedom without any guidance can be toxic. Uninvolved, aka neglectful, parents are barely present in their children’s lives. Often, they have barely any expectations of them and don’t offer them a nurturing environment.This can lead to self-sufficiency, sure, but it also results in poorer academic performance, difficulties maintaining relationships, and problems with emotional control.
Freedom is good. But too much freedom without any guidance can be toxic. Uninvolved, aka neglectful, parents are barely present in their children’s lives. Often, they have barely any expectations of them and don’t offer them a nurturing environment.
This can lead to self-sufficiency, sure, but it also results in poorer academic performance, difficulties maintaining relationships, and problems with emotional control.
I was at work and sent my dad this, he’s been kinda moody lately, so I was just sending it as more of a heads up. Keep in mind, my name is also on the lease and I pay half the rent. Also this girl is also like my sister and she moved away a year ago, she is also only in town for today and tomorrow.
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I’m 19 years old, my parents have been divorced since I was 3, and the last time I saw my dad was 10 years ago. He’s retired military so I’m on his medical, and that’s the extent he provides for me.I message him happy birthday and holiday greetings. This time he was drunk and got mad because I didn’t reply to his text message, even though I made it clear to him that my phone is broken and I’m using one with no sim.
My dad is probably my least favorite person on this earth. He’s emotionally manipulative, abusive, and controlling. He has screwed me over majorly in life. My grandparent’s house was supposed to be sold, and the money was to be given to me per their wishes for my college loans. My dad sold it and kept the money for himself. I am a pharmacist and went through 8 years of school to get my doctorate with no help from my parents, so I have a lot of loans. My dad constantly asks for expensive presents for special occasions or for me to pay for things for him, like my parent’s anniversary dinner at a steak house. It annoys me because it’s like rubbing salt in the wound of the money he stole from me.
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I had just turned 18 and moved out of my dad’s apartment into my mom’s because he’d constantly be drinking and saying horrible things to me and then wouldn’t remember it in the morning. I have more of these texts (16 more screenshots to be exact) but they’re kind of painful to read back. I honestly don’t really know if I was entitled to leave like that. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Maybe I’m the insane one.
My siblings and I have cut our parents out of our lives because for too long there has been manipulation, lying, and just downright nasty behavior. A few weeks back I decided I wanted to reach out to my old stepdad (my parents divorced and married other people a while back, they ended up divorcing those people and getting back together). I wanted to let him know that what was done to him was awful and I also wanted to just reconnect. My parents caught wind of this and that sparked my dad to text me after months of no contact to tell me I’m dead to him.The last two things he has said to me are that he’s ashamed of me and that I’m dead to him. And then an hour later he told me he loves me with all his heart. I didn’t respond.
He sent me 900$ in 2012, I was using in 2014-2016. When I got sober I made a decision to completely cut him out, he’s extremely racist and “born again Christian” and it’s been going well. The mountains of texts before this public post are similar.
We were all in the same room when he texted me, thinking he was being funny. They’ve been divorced for 16 years.
He got a new bank card and “I need you to do this for me” way of asking to change all his subscriptions last month. I updated it and thought it was that.I got this message not even 10 minutes ago. He does this every time something small doesn’t go his way and I’m tired of begging for him to calm down or stay in my life. I’m happy to not do anything for him anymore and I don’t care if he goes no contact with me anymore. Guilt-tripping me over an HBO subscription is crazy.
He sent me 45 texts like this before getting bored.
I was homeless because he kicked me out, and I risked where I was staying to have my cat with me.
My dad is very aware of our financial troubles, and it took every cent I had to get pull ups and diapers and put the remaining in gas to get to my uncle’s Thanksgiving, around 35 miles away. My dad says he lives 8 miles from me, but it is actually closer to 20 one way. My dad doesn’t usually do anything for Thanksgiving, and my mom has an order of protection against him and was with us, so I assumed the best place to take the kids to Thanksgiving dinner was my uncle’s who we don’t get to see much.
I don’t have a phone plan, so I didn’t get any of these messages until I got home. I do not live with him, so I’m not worried about my safety. Also, the cut-off message says: “Dad, I don’t have data on my phone”.
Long story short, had to move back home and my dad has never been an affectionate father. I can count on my fingers how many times I have gotten hugs from him, he was also very emotionally abusive to me growing up. As soon as I got back he started hugging me and planting kisses on my cheek and neck and I’ll move away and tell him it’s weird and I always receive blacklash from my mother and other relatives that I’m being mean and hes trying to rebuild a relationship with me. He did it again tonight and I tried to pull away from him but he was squeezing me tight and I literally yelled let me go and tried to communicate it again but he’s not getting it.
He has no power to do this. He does not live with us. His justification is that we aren’t suited to living together (because the apartment isn’t perfectly clean) despite us being very happy with our arrangement. Our roommate and her mom have both tried to tell him that he doesn’t get to make that decision for us, but he has ignored them both. His name is on the lease, but only because he and his wife used to rent this apartment before us. They moved out 3 or 4 years ago and now live an hour away. No idea why he thinks this is ok.
I still tried to send an olive branch during the holidays but got this response in return. Some people just want to stay stubborn.
Mind you, I just have short hair, which was styled and curled, and a full face of makeup in the photo.
I grew up having to walk on eggshells around my dad because any perceived slight inconvenience gets turned on you and his mood changes in an instant. We had a productive conversation recently where I finally told him it’s frustrating to deal with and he had a great response and promised to just make an effort to stop and think before reacting. I’m exhausted.
I haven’t spoken to my narcissistic dad since I told him it wasn’t healthy for me to continue trying to have a relationship with him. This officially ended all forms of communication between us. Now, I’m in a group chat with the only two family members I still talk to. They were upset because they thought I was hiding major life events from them while I’ve been in quarantine. I’m not sure why my dad tells people I’m married or pregnant; it’s likely his way of convincing himself and others that he’s still the victim.
My son (7) spent an afternoon with my dad today who is a fundamentalist Christian. My son first video called us and said god is real, why didn’t we know that. After he was dropped off, he was telling us how he needs to pray, the devil is real, everyone is corrupted etc. He now believes it’s all true because my dad has said it. I’ve always taught both sides and said it is up to them to decide.I messaged my mum about this twice and she ignored all the messages. I don’t want them involved with us or my kids anymore.
Apparently, someone’s car (probably my brother’s) leaked oil on the driveway, and my dad (stepdad technically) wants me to scrub it off.Like just hose it down? I don’t have time for that. Plus it’s the driveway, it’s bound to get dirty. Also up until a few weeks ago, he made me turn in my phone at night and wouldn’t let me have it in my room at all. Not even during daytime. I’m 21, and he continues to treat me like a child. He won’t let me eat after 10 PM either, because it “wakes him up”. I am the quietest person in the house, and my parents don’t even go to bed until 11 PM.
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