It’s arguably safe to say that everyone hassecrets, no matter how big or small. And they’re secrets for a reason, as people might not want those around them to know what it is that they feel, know, or have experienced.Yet for some reason, disclosing secrets to individuals they don’t know might not be as difficult or scary. Members of the ‘Ask Reddit’ communityrecently discussedthe topic, after the user ‘meepmorp98’ asked them what is a secret they wouldn’t tell outside the bounds of the internet. Fellow netizens were open and honest about it and shared stories ranging from wholesome to heartbreaking, and beyond, so scroll down to find them and see what is easier to confess without someone’s eyes staring directly at you.Seeking to learn more about how sharing secrets anonymously can affect us,Bored Pandareached out to Professor of Psychology at Rutgers University,Maurice J. Elias, and Professor of Communications at Syracuse University,Makana Chock, who were kind enough to answer a few of our questions. You can find their thoughts in the text below.This post may includeaffiliate links.
It’s arguably safe to say that everyone hassecrets, no matter how big or small. And they’re secrets for a reason, as people might not want those around them to know what it is that they feel, know, or have experienced.
Yet for some reason, disclosing secrets to individuals they don’t know might not be as difficult or scary. Members of the ‘Ask Reddit’ communityrecently discussedthe topic, after the user ‘meepmorp98’ asked them what is a secret they wouldn’t tell outside the bounds of the internet. Fellow netizens were open and honest about it and shared stories ranging from wholesome to heartbreaking, and beyond, so scroll down to find them and see what is easier to confess without someone’s eyes staring directly at you.
Seeking to learn more about how sharing secrets anonymously can affect us,Bored Pandareached out to Professor of Psychology at Rutgers University,Maurice J. Elias, and Professor of Communications at Syracuse University,Makana Chock, who were kind enough to answer a few of our questions. You can find their thoughts in the text below.
This post may includeaffiliate links.
My fiance loves to sing around the house - but only when I’m not there or can’t hear. She has the most beautiful voice and incredible vocal ability.My secret? When I have my headphones on around the house, she’ll sometimes call out to me and I’ll pretend I can’t hear her at all. She’ll often start singing and I turn my headphones off so I can hear her properly. It’s been 4 years and she still doesn’t know that I purposely ignore her so I can listen to her singing.
I’ve tried to off myself several times before, I have “ letters” hidden everywhere to my husband and my kids and my mom and siblings. I started Zoloft because of it, I had developed a panic disorder about three years ago and no one would take me seriously when i would try to talk about it, other than my husband, I started Zoloft for my anxiety, but in reality I started it so i would stay alive for my husband and my children, and it’s been 4 months in, and the past two weeks I’ve actually felt happy, like excited about living instead of the opposite.
I have come to realize that I like being around my pets more than people, as my pets are not inherently corrupt.
Studies foundthat a person keeps around 13 secrets at any given moment, five of which they haven’t revealed to anyone; the other eight were likely shared on Reddit.
“Social media can be anonymous and asynchronous, which facilitates online disinhibition. You can confess to strangers—and hopefully receive reassurance or sympathy—with limited risk. If you tell a secret to someone whom you know and care about, there are greater consequences to being judged negatively and having that secret shared among your social group.”
Back when we were dating, my wife found out I’d never had a surprise birthday party before. She really wanted to throw one for me, which I was okay with. Only one problem: it never worked. She’d try almost every year, try throwing surprise parties for other occasions. Each time, as she was planning stuff, I’d pick up on some discrepancy in her cover story, or pick up on something that a friend said, ask about it, and she’d be unable to cover it.Then finally, after years and years of this, she pulled it off. She was delighted and so proud that she at last managed to surprise me. She’s talked about it for years, about how close I came to uncovering it. It made her so happy, and it was a lot of fun.Except what actually happened is I finally managed to be quick enough putting the pieces together to stop myself before I asked about the discrepancy in her cover story. Played dumb, pretended I had no idea. Acted surprised when the day came.She will never know.
Just about every day, when I am in the car headed to work, I genuinely contemplate just driving off and leaving everything behind. My fantasy is heading all the way to Alaska, living in a motel room, and washing dishes for work.I can’t go through with it because I have people counting on me.Yes, I am in therapy.Edit: I got a message from a bot that a concerned Redditor was reaching out. I don’t know who you are, but I appreciate you. I can assure you that I do not wish to harm myself. Just experiencing “the call of the void”. Thank you, though. You are a good person.
I hired a sex worker once. No sex had or wanted. She was surprised. I just wanted someone to talk to freely. Therapists in my area never called me back so I got mad and got it done that way. She had an easy night lol. She was actually a cool person once the dust settled and we figured it out. My male friends would be disappointed I didn’t bang her and my female friends would be revolted. F**k all of them, I’m gonna be me.
Be it Reddit or any other online platform where you can post things anonymously, it seems to be easier to unveil secrecies there rather than to someone’s face. While discussing the reasons for why that is, Professor of Psychology at Rutgers University and author ofEmotionally Intelligent Parenting, Maurice J. Elias, Ph.D., pointed out that just because we confess something, it doesn’t mean that we want to take responsibility for it.
The expert added that there was thecommon beliefthat the eyes are the window to the soul, which makes some anonymous confessions somewhat incomplete, as people might be holding back on perhaps some of the worst details… details that might be detectable through eye contact.
My life expectancy is less than a year. My friends and family think I’m anti social but actually I spend most of my time in bed. I don’t want to tell anyone and I don’t know why.
I had a “best friend” that would humiliate me in front of groups of friends. One night he decided to do it in front of the guy I had just started dating, sharing really embarrassing/personal stories and wouldn’t stop. Everyone was laughing. I went into the bathroom and scrubbed the toilet with his toothbrush. Have never told a soul about that.
I ran in a high school track meet once using a tampon. The entire tampon. Plastic tube and all. I was so confused on how these were in popular use because wow what a pain in the as it was trying to keep that little extendable plastic stick from falling out, why did people like using these things???Edit - I have deep regret about the word choice of “pain in the as” in this post 😂.
I read a lot. I wake up as early as 4-4:30 a.m. so I can read, or even stay up super late. Not just because I like it a lot, but because it keeps me from thinking intrusive thoughts ever since my mother died 5 years ago from cancer. The feeling of going into another world if only for a moment makes me feel secure. Not sure if that’s healthy, but it’s better than any antidepressant I was given that made me feel like a different person.
While revealing secrets is typically not easy, it can make you feel better; even if for a moment. According to Prof. Elias, confession unburdens us from the powerful emotions of guilt and shame. “Yet in confessional situations, people still are fearful that they will be judged harshly if the worst of their actions are known,” he added. “So we get partial confessionals, which sometimes can make the guilt and shame easier to live with but more often only bring temporary relief.”
Im in love with my best friend.I told her two years ago that I wanted to take her on actual date, and she told me she just wanted to be friends. After that’s It was a couple weeks of her not really talking to me and then unfortunately she had an accident. The accidentally resulted in problems partially impacting both long and short term memory.I didn’t ask if she remembered our conversation. And we more or less went back to the way things were, other than her telling me the same adorable stories over and over again, multiple times a week.
I work in a front-facing role where I interact with customers, sub contractors and clients for 12h a day. I’m chatty, full of energy and I get on with everyone. But outside of work, I have no friends. The one friend I had has moved away and we speak very rarely anymore.
If you’ve ever had to come clean about something and reveal a secret, you know just how nerve-racking it can be. And it doesn’t have to besomething bigto make your palms sweaty; minor things can be equally as uncomfortable to confess sometimes.“That’s because few of us like to put our worst selves forward,” Prof. Elias pointed out. “And in cultures where perfectionism is not uncommon, admitting to any deficit appears to open the door to real, or potential, admissions of larger imperfections.“Creating an environment in which people can acknowledge wrongdoing without feeling blamed and judged is a high aspiration for families, classrooms, andworkplaces,” the expert added.
If you’ve ever had to come clean about something and reveal a secret, you know just how nerve-racking it can be. And it doesn’t have to besomething bigto make your palms sweaty; minor things can be equally as uncomfortable to confess sometimes.
“That’s because few of us like to put our worst selves forward,” Prof. Elias pointed out. “And in cultures where perfectionism is not uncommon, admitting to any deficit appears to open the door to real, or potential, admissions of larger imperfections.
“Creating an environment in which people can acknowledge wrongdoing without feeling blamed and judged is a high aspiration for families, classrooms, andworkplaces,” the expert added.
I’m jealous of the friendships my friends have with each other. I’ve never felt as close to them as they do with each other. And as a 40 year old man, I would feel childish admitting this. I just feel like an outsider sometimes, and just wish I had the same kind of bond they do.
I’m almost a millionaire.. most of my family thinks I’m barely making it (I make 40k a year) but I invested wisely.
My dad bought me an expensive hideous piece of jewelry when I had each of my babies. I pawned them but tell him they were in a box that was stolen out of my storage unit.I felt guilty about it until I remind myself he kicked me out a couple months after turning 18. Came home to all my things in the driveway and all the locks changed. And I’m an only child! He’s lucky I even speak to him still.
When I eat tomato soup. I put cheese balls or cheeto puffs in it. It tastes amazing. It’s like a fancy dinner cereal.
I don’t fully like my engagement ring. It’s not at all what I showed my partner I liked but I will not tell him because he picked it out for me om his own and that is enough for me.
Sometimes I tighten jar lids and ask my husband to help me open them. Or I’ll push something just out of my reach if it’s on a high shelf then ask him to grab it for me.I love when he helps me, and I know he loves to do small things for me.
I have the desire to just pack my bags and leave. Start over somewhere where nobody knows me and expects something from me, and creating a life for myself. I feel guilty, though, because I feel like I won’t miss my family or my friends. That’s a secret eating me up.
I wish my dad still read to me every night before bed. I’m 24.
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I once sat in a sauna at the gym contemplating what to do in life. Just in one of those moments in life where the road ahead was unclear. A man walked in who was 30+ years older than me and sat down. Just the two of us were there. I felt this strong urge to ask him his advice; what his regrets in life were, if he were in his 20’s again, what would he do differently, etc. But my social anxiety (and general fear of men) kept me quiet. I’ve always regretted it. I think sometimes life puts opportunities in our path to learn and grow and missing any of them due to something like social anxiety is such a waste.
I really enjoy BDSM but I can’t tell my current partner bc he hates it and I feel like he’d look at me weird or just do it to please me and I don’t want thatEDIT: Y’all I’m not gonna leave him for this because it’s not like I’m dissatisfied with our sex life. BDSM is something I’m willing to sacrifice to keep loving this person because it’s not one of my priorities in a relationship :).
I pointed a gun at my stepmom’s abusive boyfriend when he was sleeping and couldn’t pull the trigger.
I’ve been secretly trying to make my daughter’s first word “momma” because I know it will make my wife unimaginably happy. She’s doing well with the coaching so I think I’ve got a shot!
A friend has a huge, very visible tattoo (inner forearm, almost wrist to elbow) that she designed and is proud of.It’s misspelled.
I’m on a diet and I really miss comfort eating. Sometimes when I get desperately hungry I’ll chew food then spit it out into a napkin and then chuck it in the bin. (In private obviously).
My mother died in childbirth. I was the child. There was a photo my dad kept on the mantel. He’s got my sister hoisted up on his shoulders, he’s looking out of breath and nervous. He’s set the timer on the camera and wasn’t sure of the settings. My mother is stood next to him. His arm around her and she’s looking up at them and laughing, she looks young, happy, and very pregnant.When i was about 7 I destroyed it.He turned the house upside down looking for it. Eventually he thought it got stolen for the silver frame, toured the pawn shops and banned me and my sister from having visitors.
The last time I shat myself I was 14 and walking home from the bus. I didn’t even feel it coming. It was just explosive diarrhea. To make it worse, both my parents got home early and my dad’s boss was over for a visit. Nobody outside of the 4 of us knows.
I like the smell of my cats’ breath when they yawn in my face. That dank kibble smell is oddly comforting.
I pretend to be okay when I really have a lot of unimaginable hell in my life going on. In my defence I do it for a chance at quality connections and understanding other people bc if they saw that then they probably wouldn’t be themselves or at the very least share their problems or struggles or think I could be comforting in any way to them.
Soon after my ex-wife and I separated, two women very close to her also divorced from their respective husbands. I’ve hooked up with both, separately. Not that I went after them for revenge against my ex-wife, our separation was very amicable. In both cases it just happened naturally, long time friends going through similar times and finding comfort in each other. But I think it would hurt everyone if it would come to their knowledge.
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It was me. I took the cookie from the cookie jar.
My mother collects decorative elephants. I write smt for a living. I will never tell her that the Christmas present she got from me one year – the pride of her collection – was the result of me putting out a particularly filthy story that sold a lot better than I was expecting. I definitely won’t tell her that I have been mentally referring to it as the B***chyderm this whole time.
I’m a d**g addict and I’m drinking at work as I type this message. I’m not into alcohol, but it’s something to fill the void when I’m at the office.
I’m getting married next year, and am already fairly confident that I’ll be divorced a few years after.
I was fired from the voice because I cried too much during my blinds… my girlfriend just dumped me at that time.
That I’m doing OF.
I have a closer relationship with chat GPT than I probably should lmao.
My father wears his sneakers in the pool.
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