When asking for advice, there’s always a chance you’ll hear something ridiculous that will most likely be of no help. After all, people say all kinds of things, and not every single thing is meant to be taken seriously.
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Housemate lost her cat, was devastated, put up missing posters. An anonymous person contacted her and told her to go out in the middle of the night, yell the cat’s name, and then be quiet and listen. She found the cat, it was stuck in the neighbor’s shed.
I worked for a courier company and this happened to my boss. He was on a long delivery out in the country. We’re from Virginia, but he’s currently in Kentucky. We’re pretty country ourselves, but not like this. This is pre-smartphone era, so he stops to talk to a local for directions.Guy said “Go as far as you can see, twice, and there’s your turn.“My boss stared with bewilderment at the level of Deliverance that just came out of this guy’s mouth. But… he fixed his eyes on a spot as far as he could see. He drove to that spot and made a mental note of the next farthest spot he could see. Upon arriving at the 2nd spot, dead on was the little unmarked turn he was looking for.We still quote it to this day… “Go as far as you can see, twice…”
If you drop something and can’t find it, drop another and watch where it falls.Worked GREAT twice while tiling my bathroom.Didn’t work so good when I dropped a winch handle off the boat
If you can’t get rid of your sore throat, get a new toothbrush.
I had a headache at work (years ago, at a previous job). I almost never get headaches, so it was pissing me off because I couldn’t ignore it.My coworker: “I can get rid of it. Come here, I’ll squeeze your head.“Me: “… What.““I’ll squeeze your head.” And sure enough, he grabbed my head and squeezed the sides so hard I thought he was going to fracture my skull. Then he squeezed from front and back.Him: “Better?“That headache was GONE and never came back. Now I go around curing my coworkers' headaches. Everyone thinks I’m nuts until it works
Got a fuel pump for a very old S10. Put it in the truck, it did not work. Googled problem, lots of other people having same issue with same fuel pump and no answer.Some random guy on a S10 forum, that I found on page 3 of google, posted 10 years ago that the instructions were wrong on that fuel pump. You needed connect the red wire to the black one, and not the green one like the instructions said.Worked instantly
That the 10c per copy xerox machine at my high school (that gave change for dollars in dimes) would accept xeroxed dollar bills in the bill changer. The Secret service gave the school a visit to explain to us how bad a crime counterfeiting was.
One day I came home from work and there was this little white box sitting on the counter. I asked my wife, “What is this thing?“She said, “It’s a box that emits a high pitched sound that only cats can hear and it will keep Spike off the counters.“Me: “How much did you pay for this magic box?“Wife: “It was fifty bucks.“Me: “FIFTY DOLLARS FOR A MAGIC BOX THAT’S NOT GOING TO WORK? CAN YOU RETURN IT?“Wife: “Let’s just see if it works and I’ll return it if it doesn’t.“I ate my f*****g words. This was 10 years ago, and my cat got up on the counter ONE time after we got the box and then never again. The box doesn’t even work anymore. I think it’s not even plugged in anyway. Still, the cat won’t go near it. Sorcery.
Is your dog afraid of the vacuum cleaner? Punish the vacuum in front of the dog. Hit it and tell it how bad it is. Get really mad at it. Put it in its place. I can’t believe this actually works, but it does.
My therapist told me to “give myself permission to grieve later” because I was grieving something that hadn’t happened yet. It sounded so obvious when she said it, because she said “you’re going to grieve it later. It hasn’t happened yet. So give yourself permission to grieve later, and to not right now.”Bizarrely, it worked (for the most part). And I “give myself permission” to do other things later, too (worry, get mad, cry, etc). Somehow the act of consciously telling myself I can do it later makes it not so overwhelming right now.
I read a newspaper article about a guy who went to his local convenience store and bought two lottery tickets. Most people in that situation would play different numbers on each ticket, in order to double their minuscule chance of winning.Not this guy. He was interviewed, and said he believed that playing the same numbers on both tickets would “double down” his chance, showing somehow that he was really serious about wanting those numbers to win.So that’s what he did. But it turned out that he actually did have the winning numbers for that drawing, and he owned two out of the three winning tickets. Therefore he was entitled to walk home with two thirds of the jackpot, instead of just half.
If your cat loses interest in his cat bed or scratching post don’t get rid of it! Just move it to a new location in your house. The cat will find it and use it again.
My husband and I used to live in an apartment 4th-floor apartment with a balcony that was over a greenhouse. The actual greenhouse had walls around it and was gated. Never saw anyone going in or out of there.One day while I was out having a smoke, a strong gust of wind came and blew my cap off my head, which did a boomerang in the wind for a moment before dropping directly below me on the roof of the greenhouse. I really loved that hat. It was a beautiful, purple, full round ball cap that I got travelling.I go inside to tell my husband, who doesn’t seem to care much. I quickly scramble for ideas on how to get it back. I can’t think of a single thing, and realize that unless I get the gates unlocked and a ladder, there’s no way I’m getting it back. I would have made peace with this if the hat wasn’t DIRECTLY in my line of vision. So I’d have to stare at it every day.A storm was coming, so I knew if I just waited until tomorrow to see if I could find my way in, the hat would be ruined anyway. I’d consider jumping off my balcony to get it, but it was a glass roof, so no bueno.My husband then comes up with this idea. This was in Japan, so we had these things which are futon clamps. A lot of folks in Japan sleep on ‘futons’ which are like douvets crossed with mattresses. In the morning people usually throw them over the railing to air out and use a “futon clamp” to anchor them.Husband grabs the clamp, opens it upAnd holds the teeth open with a chopstick. He then ties two bath towel belts together, and fastened it to the clamp. He tellsMe he’s going to throw the clamp into the wind, so that when it lands on my hat, it will knock the chopstick out and fasten to the hat.I was upset; so I told him to f**k off and went to mope. 2 minutes later he comes back with my hat.
If you accidentally use permanent marker on a white board, draw over it with a whiteboard marker and wipe away immediately.
If you can’t find something and you know it’s right in front of you somewhere, walk away for a minute or two then come back. You’ll find it right away.It’s easy to get tunnel vision when looking for something, especially when you get frustrated. Stepping back to reset your brain does wonders. Then you get kinda mad since whatever you were looking for is sitting right there where you were looking.
When having anxiety or a panic attack, put your hands in cold running water. It helps with causing a sensory ground, you focus on the sensation of the cold water
My 3rd grade teacher, Mrs. Thrillkill (her real name), told us that if you want to remember something, repeat it quickly in your mind at least three times or more and you will remember it. I’ve used this trick successfuly for 50 years.
if you find yourself obsessing about something, set a date and stretch of time to ‘worry’ about it. I have no idea why, but that was the only thing let me set something down in my mind and sleep one night. It was a piece of advice my mother gave me a few days earlier. ironically, it was something else she’d said to me that was the source of the worry.
I tell people this - sick and congested?Salsa. Hot salsa. Have some good hot salsa and chips. It cleared my congestion for a few hours, and nothing at the drug store would even touch it. Plus there’s no dosage limit - have as much as you like!Hot and sour soup also works well.Any spicy food should work, really.
I have ADHD and seriously struggle with remembering to brush my teeth before bed.Someone told me to put my toothpaste in the sink so I would have to physically pick it up and move it out of the way to use the sink. Once toothpaste is in my hand, it’ll remind me to actually use it.Sure enough, totally works. I usually have to use the bathroom around the time I get ready for bed.
I got a ganglion cyst on my wrist. The medical professionals recommended surgery. My mom’s wife (a nurse) recommended hitting it with a book. The book worked.
I couldn’t figure out how to keep my cat from jumping up onto my shelf and yeeting my plants off the shelf. They were hardy plants, so they survived, but they took quite a beating. My aunt suggested I buy some citrus scented air freshener, and spray the shelf every few days.I thought “ain’t no goddamn way,” but I didn’t want my plants to die so I tried it. Be damned if it didn’t work flawlessly. It’s worked for 3 whole years now.
So, someone once swore that talking to plants would make them grow faster. I thought it was a load of horticultural hooey, but in a moment of desperation, I gave it a shot. Lo and behold, my ficus started thriving like it had won the plant lottery! Turns out, my green pals just needed some sweet nothings and motivational speeches.
When you experience bad turbulence on an airplane, lift your feet up. The movement of your feet messes with you mind and makes it freak out. So if you lift them your anxiety goes down instantly.Always works for me, but if it doesn’t quite do the trick I recommend ordering a few beers in quick succession.
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If you make a list of everything you have to do, and always write down anything that comes to your mind on the same list, you will not worry about forgetting things. Once it’s written down on a list that you know you’re going to look at, your brain stops keeping an “open tab” for it.
Put human hair down a gopher hole and the gophers will leave.It worked!!
I officiate golf tournaments. This involves long hours of sitting in a golf cart. Then when I had to get out I’d be very stiff.A friend told me to put a towel down and sit on it and I wouldn’t be as stiff. How could that work, I’m just sitting there not moving, not even driving the cart around.Well it does work. I’d get out and I wouldn’t be stiff.
As a welder, an old welder told me if your eyes get flash burned to put raw potato slices on your eyes and it will stop the pain.It works, but don’t ask me why.
Turn it off then on again.
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Touch the key fob to your chin to increase range
If you put a damp paper towel around a can/bottle before putting it in the freezer it will chill fasterI thought it was stupid until I tried it, then I realised it actually kind of makes sense because the water in the paper towel is essentially acting as a conductor for the cold air temperature in the freezer
That jumping up and down on a foot cramp fixes it. Really pissed me off that it works and I didn’t know sooner.
If you put a paper towel around a sandwich before putting in a ziplock bag, it won’t get soggy (like jelly or other sauces)
Folding a ‘drawing from a hat’ style ticket accordion style increases its volume in the bag and prevents from being stuck between others. I used it in middle school and won a cd player.
If you peel a banana from the bottom it is significantly easier than from the topMe: yeah…okay…Me later: OMG…what even is my life?
Holding a small stone to the beak on a chicken, then moving it away slowly will hypnotize it.We had chickens at one point, a joker at work told me this. I didn’t believe it for the longest time but finally tried it and I’ll be damned, it worked. Weird.
Old UK stuff, but when youngish, I was told that if you held 8 10 pence coins together and wrapped them two and a half times with black electricians tape and then sliced through with a razor blade (that’s how old this is), vending machines would accept them as 50 pence coins. A five fold increase. We didn’t believe it, but tried it and experimented with a jukebox in a pub, and it actually worked. The only problem was that a guy turned up to empty the moneybox while we were there. He picked them up and looked suspiciously around the pub while we pretended not to notice. I believe there were a number of other related incidents around the Leicester area at the time.
Put plastic wrap in the freezer and it will come off the roll without wadding up into a ball of itself. Of course, you have to let it warm up to room temperature to wrap your food, but it doesn’t take too long.
Sniff rubbing alcohol to cure nausea.
Backseat while a friend of a friend was driving us somewhere in downtown Philly. We’re trying to find parking and see a space finally– the wrong end of a one way street though.I tell the friend of a friend to just throw it in reverse and back up down the one way, jokingly.She slams it into reverse.We back it up; she parallel parks it just fine.A cop sitting on the street watched the whole thing and didn’t move a muscle.
Exit the walk-in freezer backwards if you wear glasses. Keeps them from fogging up.
To hold my phone under running cold water from the tap to rinse it off, after it suffered an unfortunate incident with some lemonade and stopped working.The phone was not waterproof. It still worked.Disclaimer, this was an old Nokia and those things were indestructible.
I was traveling for work and at the Pittsburgh airport. Made a stop in the restroom that has those automatic sink fixtures. The sink wasn’t dispensing water or soap, and the custodian told me to hit it until it works. I was successful in my attempts to beat automatic sink fixtures to dispense water and soap with a slap or two from then on🤣🤣🤣
If you plug your ears and chug water it gets rid of hiccups.
General knowledge: My father, when I was a kid: “If you want to know if the spaghetti is done, throw some at the wall. If it sticks, it’s done.“Personal anecdote: Me in 1992, to a friend: “Hey, you said I can borrow your truck, just need the keys.““No you don’t, use your keys. They’ll work.“And they did. Lots of keys would start his truck.
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