Unfortunately, not allEureka momentsin life relate to positive realizations. Sometimes they lead one to awakenings that can hurt them immensely, such as learning that a person they considered a friend is not actually worthy of the title.
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Back in my first year of college, I used to have a group of friends (like 7 dudes with me included). We always hang out together and we’re used to have this “group chat” where we discuss about anything from class subjects to random things. After a year, I noticed that one of the guys (let’s just call him Randy) keeps getting excluded; Not invited/informed to group hangout while they’re talking smack behind his back. And the “unofficial leader” of the group actually made a whole new group chat, inviting everyone (myself included) except Randy without his knowledge.I know what it feels to be left out, I experienced that in Middle school and it’s really awful. I stopped hanging out with them and I starts hanging out with Randy. He’s quite eccentric but a very good person at heart. We’ve been friends for more than 6 years, and he still got my back
When you decide to let them be the one to reach out. And you never hear from them again.
I had been giving rides to a girl I thought was my friend. To and from school in high school. She wasn’t really suppose to ride with other teens but due to her mothers work hours we could easily pull this off. I thought we were close.One day while on the way home my brakes went out. We were about 2 blocks from her gated neighborhood. I managed to roll in safely and parked at her house to call a tow truck.She flipped. Told me I couldn’t stay. She knew my brakes were not working as she had also been terrified when we couldn’t stop. She said she wanted to go to a movie that weekend with other friends and her mom would ground her if she saw me at the house. I offered to lie and say I only stopped there as my car malfunctioned on my way home. I had to pass her neighborhood on my way home anyways.She refused. Started to scream at me. She didn’t care what happened I had to go. Started to call the guard at the front gate to tell them I had broken in and was threatening her.I left her and that friendship that moment. I managed to roll my car slowly to a mechanic not too far away but never forgot the s**t feeling of knowing I could have been seriously hurt and she wouldn’t have cared. She wanted to see a movie. She had the nerve to sheepishly call and ask me a couple days later if I could give her a ride to school. Told her I was too busy and no longer had time… after all I wanted to help her obey her moms rules. She rode the bus til she graduated.
I had this friend in school. Each year there was a funfair in our city, all students received vouchers for a drink and something to eat. This friend complained the whole day that she had no one to accompany her to the funfair. So, stupid me offered to go with her.Once we arrived we met another friend of hers. And another, and another… until we were a group of 5 or 6 people. I didn’t know anyone and was basically just walking behind them. This friend took me aside and said, “My friends think you are annoying, and we would like you to leave.“It was a pleasure to see that she failed her exams a year later.
Him and his girlfriend asked if they could spend Christmas Day with me, my husband and our children because otherwise they’d be at home alone all day with only junk food to eat (neither of them could cook)I organised transport over and home again after (neither of them could drive either) I cooked us all a full Christmas dinner. I organised fun games and activities so it wouldn’t be boring.My friend and his girlfriend didn’t offer to help with anything, not cooking, not serving, not cleaning up, and not paying. They wouldn’t play the games and weren’t interested in the activities. They just wanted to sit on the sofa and eat. Then came the complaining…They complained because we had Pepsi instead of Coke.They complained that we had semi-skimmed milk instead of full fat.They complained that my husband wouldn’t play video games with them (he was busy with the kids while I cooked)They complained that there wasn’t mashed potatoes as well as roast potatoes.They complained because they wanted different vegetables from the ones I was serving.They didn’t thank us for anything. Needless to say I was glad when they went home. Friendship didn’t survive long after that.
When I got back (to the US) from a trip to South America, I had $7 to my name. The next morning a ‘friend’ asked me to go to breakfast, so I could tell him about my trip. I said I didn’t have any money and couldn’t afford it. However, he said that’s ok and off we went. When we arrived at the breakfast joint and the server came over to get our order, my ‘friend’ pointed at me and said “he isn’t getting anything”.
Finding out they have an inner-circle group chat but I’m the only one not in it.
When I finally opened up about what was really going on in my life, and she said that it was all too much for her to hear about. She straight up never called me back. We used to be best friends.
When I got really sick. Very few came to help.
Her response to finding out my husband had been cheating on me was to say to me “oh yeah, I definitely could have slept with him if I wanted to”
It was several “friends.” I realised that their idea of fun was to just constantly insult me. Not playful “roasting”, full on constant insults.
At lunch, she was sitting with her boyfriend, I was sitting with our friend circle. She came up to me, guilted me into sitting with her and her boyfriend, and then proceeded to ignore me for the rest of lunch.She didn’t care about me, she just didn’t want me talking to the friend circle that she had abandoned for her boyfriend. When I pointed this out to her, she called me a jealous b***h.Ah, high school. How I don’t miss thee.
When plans with me became tentative should something better with someone else come up. That s**t hurts.
When he only called me when he needed something. It didn’t hit me until much later.
Riding in my best friend’s car, in our early 20s, telling her about how my relationship with my mother was becoming so toxic and crumbling before my eyes- she interrupted me to ask that I be quiet during her favorite part of the song that was on the radio. When that part was finished, she told me I could resume my story. I was pouring my heart out. I was young and devastated, and even then I knew that was a really messed up thing to do and it instantly changed the way I viewed her as a friend. We were going on seven years of close friendship, and it was finished in that one car ride.
When I was red my friends all disappeared. The guy who red me wasn’t even in our friend circle and went to jail for another crime. It wasn’t he said she said it was very obviously re. I lost all of my friends and when I confronted a couple of them after going to therapy they said “we believed you we just didn’t want to deal with the DRAMA” I had never even talked about the re with them I was just less entertaining when we hung out because I was traumatized. These are people who I let stay at my house whenever, I had a good job so I bought them things, I was always the driver and always the person they would turn to when they needed something. It was a hard lesson to learn at 16 and I didn’t actually learn it then, I just internalized it and believed I was overreacting and I had done something wrong. I still believe the best in everyone but man, that belief gets shaken quite a lot. Now I’m friends with my husband and kids and don’t bother with anyone else.
When he stole my checkbook, forged my signature and took money out of my account. This was after I let him live with me and my family for two years after his parents kicked him out in high school
Anytime I had good news, she’d find an INSTANT way to downplay it.“I got the job!” (Ha! You’re excited about that hourly???)“My crush just texted me about hanging out!” (Right. Like you have money to do cool st.)“The gym is working – I’m down 8 lbs!” (It’s water weight, sweetie, chill.)Literally nothing that made me happy could come outta my mouth and be celebrated in kind. This was someone I grew up thinking was “so cool,” but only made me feel like st to be around. I finally broke away and it pissed her off so bad, she actively spilled my secrets and “tea” to folks who had no business knowing that much stuff about me.Oh well.
When she tried to poison me with drano, she was moving away the next day hoping she would not get caught, she was just way too insistent I eat lunch she made, tipped me off.
When they loved the idea of me shining, but behind their shadow, I could never do or achieve anything above them, and when I did, they would get jealous.
When the only time we hung out is when I initiated making plans.
Friend “A” warned me that Friend “B” was openly disrespectful, even hostile when speaking of me when I wasn’t around. They got into an argument. Friend B sent me screenshots of their conversation to get me on their side but there seemed to be whole sentences missing. When I asked for clarification, they called me dumb. Friend A showed me all the missing messages where they called me much worse than just “dumb”. Friend B lost two great friends for good after that.
Talking behind my back about private stuff.
I had one friend go and tell my boss I was job hunting.Had a few steal from me.Had one blame me when she stole something.I’ve had quite a few deliberately trigger my trauma to the point where I stopped telling people about it.
Constantly “one ups” me. A real friend is happy for you.
When he would only take and never even offer to give back. Always with the “I left my money at home, but ill totally pay you back.” Never paid anything back, ever. Other friends and I would call him out on it but there was always an excuse. Eventually he screwed over another mate at a gig they went to (only thing he paid for was a drink, had another mate even pay for his ticket in with some BS reason), so we all collectively decided we don’t need or want him around anyway.He’s barely made an attempt to keep in touch in 10 years and we certainly haven’t.
When they didn’t remember our conversations and just talked for the sake of talking
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When I came out. And it wasn’t just one.
He slapped my cat in the face. He’s lucky I’m a passive because I would’ve absolutely wrecked him if I was a violent person.
She had sex with my brother. Who was married…. While she was also married. While being his wife’s best friend. Military.
Keep taking, but never give back.
Her dad died and I made sure that I was there to listen and support in any way she needed me to. My grandad (who I was very close to) died and I didn’t hear from her for three months.
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He tried to feel me up at her birthday party.I tried to tell her, but she took his side.We’re no longer friends.
I totally supported him for years because he was going through a rough patch. Not entirely, but ANYTIME we went out, beers, golf, movies, concerts, food was on me. He always protested a little bit and said he didn’t want to take advantage.I had noticed that he hadn’t lifted a finger to help himself in quite awhile and was cool sponging off his mom. Whenever I mentioned ways I could help besides giving him s**t or ways he could make money, he got s****y and said people weren’t helping him with his depression (I tried. Leading a horse to water, etc.)I fell on hard times and couldn’t afford to foot the bill for everything. Man, I felt so dumb when he got pissed because I asked him to cover part of his meal and drinks at the bar.
When I quit drinking and they never wanted to hang out again or when they did want to hang out they wanted to meet at the bar.
When she was happy to hear that I was getting divorced. She was unhappily single and wanted to see me unhappily single, too.
I’ve always been that kind of friend who is always there for other people. Even if they call me up at 3:00 a.m. in the middle of a snowstorm to come pick them up. I’ve always been reliable. But then I realized when I finally needed something, even when it wasn’t a big something, and they were never available and always had an excuse and always ignored me and could never be bothered to lift a finger but yet had no issues constantly asking me for favors. That’s no friend
Best friend/man at my wedding slept with my married sister on my wedding night. Whole family found out, told me after we got back from honeymoon.
When she only wanted to be friends when she needed me or had time for me. Never when I needed her.
When something bad happened to me and they had to contain a gleeful expression
When I was at my lowest point in life the friends that came to visit are the ones I still have and the ones that didn’t bother I cut them off and lost contact with them purposely. Life is too short for that
When they told me that no one will ever love or go for me
When they won’t sacrifice equally over an extended period of friendship. Like they won’t travel to you but expect it back, won’t call to make plans but is okay doing so when you do it, speaks to you in ways that are disrespectful but it isn’t done to all friends just some or one (if your a guy thill make sense, targeted roasting), etc.
When I told them I had an issue with racial slurs, and then they proceeded to say it 1000 times to p**s me off.When one friend literally screamed at me after beating them on a game. SWBF2 ended a friendship quicker than any other outside force had done
If they’re not happy to see you win/They dont want you to win.
Had personal issues and confided this person. Then this person went ahead and told coworkers.
He made fun of me just to be the man infront of girls, never cared about what I feltThis happend years ago
When my phone got stolen and I lost their phone numbers. Mine stayed the same, but we just never talked again.
My best friend for years threw a party and trashed my house while me & my family were on vacation, she also stole my vape, gave her friends my clothes and swim suits, and took my car for multiple joy rides. Then once people start hearing about it she goes around telling everyone how sorry she is and how horrible she feels, how she is so scared she will lose me as a friend.I never heard anything from her other than “I didn’t do anything wrong”.
She moved 15 minutes away and I never heard from her again
When she had daily drama, health issues, family issues, truth issues…and was all about “me me me” all the time. Draining as hell.
When the meds made them go away
When she used what I told her in confidence as an attack during a disagreement we were having.That b***h can choke.
She broke up with her boyfriend and hooked up with me and mine for a “crazy” night. We were all adults, consensual and discussed it beforehand and afterwards. We repeated the experience at her request. Two weeks later she decided to try and get back with her boyfriend and told him about her escapade. He apparently refused to take her back if she had slept around, so she told him my bf and I had drugged and taken advantage of her. Yeah. Bonus: I am myself a r**e survivor and she knows this. I felt disgusted with myself with the simple accusation of doing such a horrendous thing. Years later she reached out, apologized and we ironed things out. Of course, things never went back to before and I am sad I lost a friend I liked dearly.
When everything felt more like a social opportunity for her
When it comes to money, you can tell whether you are a friend or an enemy
One of my high school girlfriends spent the summer away. When she returned, my “friend” told her, “Damn, this dude really loves you.” And then he slept with her. Turns out neither of them were my friends.
She told me she’d talked with my boyfriend (my first serious bf) and he was breaking up with me. Then, as I’m crying and upset, she tells me she needs to go because she needs to talk to HER bf. Yeah, f****d up s**t.
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