Everything in moderation is considered a golden rule for a reason, as too much of anything can have detrimental consequences, even if stemming from the best of intentions. The same goes for parents’ care for their children, which, if unlimited, can turn into excessive control and preoccupation, also known as helicopter parenting.A redditor under the moniker ‘hey__its__me’ has recently asked their fellow netizens to share the worst cases of helicopter parenting they have ever seen; andshare they did. The redditors’ stories covered everything from parents listening in on children’s phone conversations to tying their shoes for a decade longer than they probably should have, and beyond. If you’re interested in more examples of such parenting, scroll down to find them on the list below and see just how involved some moms and dads are in the lives of their children.Below you will also findBored Panda’sinterview with professor of psychological science at University of Mary Washington and an expert in helicopter parenting, Holly H. Schiffrin, PhD, who was kind enough to share her insight on the topic.This post may includeaffiliate links.
Everything in moderation is considered a golden rule for a reason, as too much of anything can have detrimental consequences, even if stemming from the best of intentions. The same goes for parents’ care for their children, which, if unlimited, can turn into excessive control and preoccupation, also known as helicopter parenting.
A redditor under the moniker ‘hey__its__me’ has recently asked their fellow netizens to share the worst cases of helicopter parenting they have ever seen; andshare they did. The redditors’ stories covered everything from parents listening in on children’s phone conversations to tying their shoes for a decade longer than they probably should have, and beyond. If you’re interested in more examples of such parenting, scroll down to find them on the list below and see just how involved some moms and dads are in the lives of their children.
Below you will also findBored Panda’sinterview with professor of psychological science at University of Mary Washington and an expert in helicopter parenting, Holly H. Schiffrin, PhD, who was kind enough to share her insight on the topic.
This post may includeaffiliate links.
My brother was injured in a training accident in the Israeli army. It wasn’t life threatening but it was a pretty messy injury that needed immediate care. For some reason the base commander tried to hide the injury and refused to send my brother to the hospital. Instead he sent him to the camp medic who took one look at my brother and said “here, have some morphine and holy god I’m going to call for help”. My brother asked him to call my mom. My mom, a military police major at the time, commandeered a helicopter along with a squad of MP’s. She then flew up into Lebanon where my brother was based, landed in the middle of his base, ordered her way into the medical tent while setting the MP’s outside as guards, loaded my brother into the chopper and evacced him out. To be fair, she’s a great mom who usually lets us fail on our own, but you asked for helicopter parenting examples and it doesn’t get more helicopter parent than actually commandeering an armed helicopter to go take care of your son!
Not really one instance, but many from the same parent. Cutting food for a 16 year old. Explaining the menu over the shoulder of said 16 year old. Using the word “pee pee “for said 16 year old. Checking his Instagram and starting a conversation about it at family dinner, of said 16 year old. This was in 2 hours, yesterday. Cringe.
Prof. Holly Schiffrin pointed out that according to some research, helicopter parenting affects four main outcome areas, including the child’s psychological well-being (the level of anxiety and depression, for instance), their behavior (for example, alcohol and drug use), their social and relational skills (such as romantic relationships and friendships), and their academic performance or career goals.“By far the most research has been conducted on the psychological outcomes and there are very consistent findings (although almost entirely correlational) that helicopter parenting is associated with more anxiety and depression as well as less satisfaction with life,” Dr. Schiffrin toldBored Panda.“The primary explanation for this relationship that has been examined has been self-determination theory, which states that there are three pillars of everyone’s well-being including autonomy (being able to make your own choices), competence, and relatedness to other people, and helicopter parenting seems to undermine all three of the concepts.”
Prof. Holly Schiffrin pointed out that according to some research, helicopter parenting affects four main outcome areas, including the child’s psychological well-being (the level of anxiety and depression, for instance), their behavior (for example, alcohol and drug use), their social and relational skills (such as romantic relationships and friendships), and their academic performance or career goals.
“By far the most research has been conducted on the psychological outcomes and there are very consistent findings (although almost entirely correlational) that helicopter parenting is associated with more anxiety and depression as well as less satisfaction with life,” Dr. Schiffrin toldBored Panda.
“The primary explanation for this relationship that has been examined has been self-determination theory, which states that there are three pillars of everyone’s well-being including autonomy (being able to make your own choices), competence, and relatedness to other people, and helicopter parenting seems to undermine all three of the concepts.”
I knew a person who basically was so unprepared that the university basically assigned her a social worker to help her navigate life. She was brilliant but her mother made running her daughter’s life her raison d’etre. Because of privacy laws the Uni couldn’t legally tell the mother anything which made her go ballistic and had to be removed several times from the campus in the early morning for trying to break into the dorms.I met her in college where she was volunteering at (I worked in the office) with the life skills classes that basically helped her put her life together. She had to graduate a year late because of all the remedial work she had to do. She did her master’s degree and PhD in Europe (she had citizenship through her dad) and then moved to some little village in the middle of nowhere, simply to get away from her mom. Her mom’s still looking for her over a decade later, telling everyone that will listen that her father kidnapped her and is keeping her child form her.
“They also do things for their children that they should be doing for themselves, which reduces the opportunity to practice skills and develop competence, as well as sends a—likely unintentional—message that the parent doesn’t think the child is competent enough to do it themselves. Both of these dynamics seem to negatively impact how related the child feels to the parent and others.”
Grandma feeding 13 year old so he doesn’t have to interrupt playing his ps3.
I went on a date with a girl, about an hour after the date ended, I get a Facebook friend request from BOTH the mother and father. Didn’t go on a second date since it freaked me out and she saw nothing wrong with it.
The parenting expert continued that the next most studied area has been the way helicopter parenting affects the child’s academic performance; however, research has provided mixed findings, as some studies suggest there’s a relationship between helicopter parenting and academic engagement, success, and entitlement, while others do not.“There have been a couple of studies looking at careers, which have found maladaptive workplace responses to hypothetical scenarios as well as weaker vocational identity,” Schiffrin told Bored Panda.“A newer focus of research has been on behavioral outcomes, which have typically found that the emerging adult children of helicopter parents engage in more risky behavior such as alcohol and substance use, sexual coercion, as well as video game addiction.”
The parenting expert continued that the next most studied area has been the way helicopter parenting affects the child’s academic performance; however, research has provided mixed findings, as some studies suggest there’s a relationship between helicopter parenting and academic engagement, success, and entitlement, while others do not.
“There have been a couple of studies looking at careers, which have found maladaptive workplace responses to hypothetical scenarios as well as weaker vocational identity,” Schiffrin told Bored Panda.
“A newer focus of research has been on behavioral outcomes, which have typically found that the emerging adult children of helicopter parents engage in more risky behavior such as alcohol and substance use, sexual coercion, as well as video game addiction.”
My former college posts their little police blotter on Facebook. Not that long ago, they posted with a story about a parent who saw that his daughter snapchatted with a boy at 2am from her dorm. Supposedly, this angered her father so much, that from the time of the post until around 10am the next morning, he kept trying to call his daughter, but she wasn’t answering the phone. So what does he do?He calls the university police, and reports that she’s “missing.“So they basically do a welfare check on her and the story ends with “the student contacted her father.“I commented on the Facebook post, said something like “Dad’s just upset that his adult daughter’s hooking up” or something. A man who appeared to be in his 40’s/50’s, angry-emoji’d my comment. I like to think that this was the dad.
Interviewed a guy fresh out of college for a job once, and his mom called me for a follow-up a few weeks later.
In high school the mother of one of my classmates asked people on facebook to pray for her oldest son because of his p**n addiction. Idk if that is helicopter parenting but it was definitely weird.
“The least researched area would be the social and relational outcomes,” Prof. Schiffrin pointed out. “The few studies that have been conducted tend to show a negative relationship between helicopter parenting and relationships with the family of origin, friends, and romantic partners, for example, a desire to stay single or to postpone marriage. However, this area could definitely benefit from more research.”
My best friend got married last Saturday. After the reception in the afternoon she had to lie to her parents. She said was going to go shopping with her new husband, but really she went back to his house. They told her to be back to their house in two hours. It was infuriating to witness.
Called off because her 17 year old son was home sick. Like single day sick, not hospital sick. I thought it was lie, but no she really doesn’t let her 17 year old stay home alone.
The influence of helicopter parenting on the mind of a developing child seems to be evident, but it’s not only kids of young age that such parents tend to coddle. Sometimes their involvement can be too much even after the child has become an adult, which can be a difficult thing to explain to a helicopter mom or dad.
“In terms of letting parents know that their involvement is too much, I think that the more this is discussed and parents are educated about it the better it will be,” Holly Schiffrin suggested. “Parenting this way is stressful and exhausting to parents; however, I think they do it because they genuinely think that they are helping their children. If they can come to understand that these helicopter parenting behaviorsare not helpful—and may be harmful—it would give them permission to step back and parent differently, which would benefit their children and themselves.
I have a friend in his late 20’s whose mom won’t let him use Facebook, takes away privileges for minor things, and won’t let him go out for more than a few hours on his own. I’ve met the mom, she’s very controlling, and yells at him about every tiny faux-pas.
I had a friend who’s mom was extremely invasive with her friends' phones. Her mom asked if she could use my phone to book a hotel (I had data and it was 2007 so she had a slow computer) so I said yeah since you have to be “true to your word” when you’re a Christian, apparently.She later comes back with my phone asking if my mom looks through my texts. I say no and she comes back with, “well she should. I just read a few of your texts and you’re swearing, talking to boys, and also telling your mom to call so you have have to stay here. It’s appalling” I was devastated. Being in 7th-8th grade I did swear, I didn’t talk dirty to boys even though I still have conversations with them, and sometimes my friend would just be a straight up b***h and I would want an excuse to go home.I was friends with her all through high school up until my second year of college. I do miss her a little, but since I don’t go to church anymore (which was drama and a half) her and my other “friends” don’t want to associate with me unless I go to 20’s group, a bible study, and become involved with church again. I remember they taught “spread the love of Jesus, but only stay in the “Christian” group”. This doesn’t speak for other churches/religions it may just be that the church is extremely exclusive with who they associate with.
Not the worst case, but it always baffles me when I see a 17/18 year old walk into a job interview with their parents, not to sure how common this is but I’ve seen it happen a few times.
Idk, the Mom who came and ate lunch with her sons and sat in class with them until they were in 8th grade, and broke through a police barrier during a lockdown to get to her son is definitely up there. The dad who came to every single cross country and track and field practice, prohibited his daughter from talking with other athletes, and coached her and exclusively her at practice until the administration told him to f-off is a close tie. When said administration told him to stop he verbally and physically assaulted the school Athletic director and immediately switched his daughter to a different school. Idk man.
I was coaching a high school wrestling team. Every week we’d have wrestle offs for the varsity spot. Well this one week a kid who barely had people in his weigh class wrestled off against a new transfer to the school. He lost. After the match was awarded he went to the bathroom to cry it out. Not five minutes later a minivan screeches in to the parking lot. I look outside and here comes the losers mom. She entered the room and demanded a meeting with the coaches. We told her it wasn’t going to happen we were in the middle of practice. She stormed out and went to the principle. He explained that we would all be meeting after practice.After practice the show down began. We pulled out our team standards and practices paper work of which she and her son had signed. This was enough for the principal so he left. The mom spent the next 20 minutes arguing that her some deserved the spot more for a bunch of b*****t reasons. So we suggested another wrestle off the next day( we knew he was going to get his as kicked again, the new guy was really good) and suggested she come watch. The next day she was there the whole practice and watched her son get worked.A few years later I quit coaching.That was my first intro to helicopter parents and won’t be my last.
My MIL planned to accompany my wife and I on our honeymoon, without our knowledge.Thankfully we’d already asked her to check in on our hamster while we were gone, so her plans were scuppered.We only found out about this “plan” after we returned home, she seriously didn’t see why we wouldn’t want her to come with us.
Worked with the mother of a 35 year old single woman who couldn’t pack her own suitcase when she went on vacation, has never poured her own cereal into a bowl, has never put toothpaste on her own toothbrush. Mom and dad charged her no rent, handled all her bills (amazingly she had a job although mom driver her there every day) and when she bought a corvette, mom and dad started parking their cars on the street so she could have the garage. Her paycheck was only for her fun expenses and the car but they paid the insurance.
I was a birthday party host at a lasertag place in an upper-middle class area, and I saw ALOT of these types. This one, however, goes down as the worst helicopter parent in memory. We always let the birthday kid into the vest room first, so that they felt special and so we could make sure they knew how to play. Well when I pulled Jimmy (or whatever) into the room first, his father comes barreling up to my coworker who was blocking the door from the swarms of other tiny children waiting their turn. He’s literally yelling at the topof his lungs “LET ME IN THERE, THATS MY SON IN THERE!” like we were literally kidnapping him before his eyes. Once he was in he calmed down a bit and watched while the kids played tag. After the game, it was birthday cake time. I don’t know how many of y’all know about the consistency of different birthday candles but this kids cake had the s****y little “happy birthday” letter candles that melt atrociously fast. Naturally, tiny droplets of wax got all over the cake but it’s non-toxic and kids usually just don’t give a s**t, right? NOPE. Heli-dad tells me the wax is a carcinogen and that I will not serve the cake until I have removed every single bit of wax. He even sat and carefully watched me do it. I did my best, but apparently it wasn’t enough cuz he didn’t tip. Kids gonna be messed up one day :/ tl;dr Helicopter Dad thinks I want to kidnap his child and give him cancer
The kid who grew up across the street from me had a crazy helicopter mom. I won’t get into all the things she did for him, but the thing that seems the worst for me now is that she wouldn’t let him live in the dorms when he went off to college at Georgia Tech and she would drive him (because she never let him get his driver’s license) to and from class every day. We lived in the suburbs of Atlanta and on a typical day, the commute would probably have been 45 minutes to an hour.
I had a friend in school who was coddled very much so that she couldn’t tie her own shoelaces when she was in 12th grade. Her parents would tie her shoelaces for her throughout her school life. Now she’s studying medicine, don’t know how well she’s doing
It was my mom. I love her and she’s gotten much better but as the oldest, I was the trial run and I was a sthead. So I hated high school, but got enough credits to graduate early. Usually, the graduating class got done a few days early so there were a few days of class for the underclassmen after graduation. My mom noticed a parent email from my math teacher about a missed homework assignment that she missed in her inbox the week prior.I She got this the day after I’d graduated and I was leaving to go to basic training within the week. She printed the assignment out, did the work and then asked me if I wanted to go grab a bite. Kidnapped me and drove me to the school THAT I HAD JUST GRADUATED FROM THE DAY BEFORE and demanded that I go hand in my missing assignment to see if I could get my grade bumped. Like, no b*h I will not. Never got to have that lunch either.
See Also on Bored Panda
I work with the Pokémon Club at my university. And on numerous occasions I’ve had people unable to participate in club events because their parents took away their 3DS so they could focus on their studies. These people are in their 20s, and it’s not like it’s one person either
Daughter is stuck in low wage job and has never really developed a full personality. She moved out at 32 to move in with first and only boyfriend. They have been together for years but Mom forbids her to marry. So she doesn’t. Sad situation all around.
Continue reading with Bored Panda PremiumUnlimited contentAd-free browsingDark modeSubscribe nowAlready a subscriber?Sign In
Continue reading with Bored Panda Premium
Unlimited contentAd-free browsingDark mode
Unlimited content
Ad-free browsing
Dark mode
Subscribe nowAlready a subscriber?Sign In
I have a very… Very German grandmother. She calls my father every day in the morning (he drives a freight truck at night) and the conversation goes something like this:Grandmother: (frantic) “Are you okay?“Dad: “Yes, are YOU okay?“Grandmother: “Yes"Dad: “Okay"Grandmother: “Okay"If we go on trips, she will randomly call us and say “You are (insert location x hours from home).” She tries to micromanage every aspect of any trip we tell her about; asking what we’re doing, asking what time we’ll be doing it, and will tell us how to do it (she’s definitely not trying to give advice).Or if my she wants my dad to do something for her, she is always right over his shoulder trying to tell him what to do and how to do it. It’s gotten to the point to where my dad has said on numerous occasions “I’m a big boy now Mom.“My dad is 60. This still goes on to this day, not as badly anymore now that she lives in an assisted living home, but it’s still definitely there.Before this post, I never knew there was a name for this behavior, but now I know! Thank you!
Had a 31 years old show up at a job interview with his mother…. I was quite confused when a 50 something woman came in and presented herself and his son
I knew a girl in high school who’s mother shaved her legs for her. In. High. School.
I worked with a girl whose mom called and quit for her because the job was too stressful. We worked at American Eagle…..come on.
My best friend had a helicopter Mum when he was underage. On his sixteenth birthday, she followed us to the cinema to ensure we got our tickets properly. She printed off a map of the shopping complex for him despite it being a pretty small place. When I realized I’d forgotten ID to get a student ticket, she ASKED the attendants if that was okay- even though they didnt check it in the first place.I’m so glad she’s let go of him now that he’s older.
I practically have to learn some things that my other peers already know how to do over the summer before I’m on my own. It’s embarrassing and honestly, my mother sheltered me a f**k ton.
My dad had/has a hard time letting go. Not sure if this story applies here, but it reminded me of this. One day during my senior year of high school, I stayed after school for 10 minutes to talk to a teacher about a project I was working on. I usually got home from school at about 3:30, but since I stayed late, I got home at 3:45. Both of my parents called my cell phone on the way home freaking out because they thought I got detention or was in a car accident…I was 18 years old and never been disciplined at school ever.I cut my dad slack because he was a police officer for several years, so he’s super protective. I guess it’s better than having parents that don’t care at all.
A colleague at work used to spend huge amount of time doing her son’s homework. I once caught her working on a paper he had to do and asked I her about it and she claimed she was only proofreading it….. yeah sure. Of course this kid always had straight A’s and was the youngest of his scout troop to earn an eagle badge, the list goes on.
My cousin at 10 still didn’t know how blow on his food to cool it. His Mom/Dad would put it in the fridge for like three to five minutes.
There are people around me who don’t explain to their older children why “bad words” are bad. instead, they screech and squirm at other adults that allow a cuss word to slip out around their kid. They expect the “no cuss word umbrella effect” will keep their kids from learning cuss words and using them. It’s better to let your kid hear it and explain to them why they shouldn’t use it until they’re an adult. Kids are pretty damn smart and understand rules when you actually implement rules and routine in their lives. This is me speaking for the average child, not children with disabilities or disorders.One of these parents got mad at my husband for letting a cuss word slip. i can’t even remember what it was. Something silly like “damn” or “s**t”. She freaked out. So I looked at the kid, lets pretend his name is Brian, and said “You know not to say that word, right Brian?” The dad stepped in and said “Don’t make him think about it. Maybe he’ll forget if you don’t bring it up.” Wooooooooooooow. As soon as that kid hits his rebellious stage, it’s gonna be f-bombs left and right LOL
I’m 18, leaving for college in the fall, my dad still insists on controlling all of my income. He has to approve all of my financial decisions and makes me ask him before I take out any money.
My mom knows someone who has a kid in college. This mom called her kid’s professor to apologize that the kid missed class, because the mom didn’t call the kid to wake them up that morning.
One of my parents always came with me on school trips in elementary school. None of the others parents did that. Hate them for it until this day.Oh and they also still call to make sure I get home safely when I go out. Although I’M 22 YEARS OLD.
I have a coworker that has her parenta drop her off at work daily. She still lives with her parents and until recently they came to all of the mandatory all staff meetings and work parties. She isn’t slowShes 28.
Modal closeAdd Your Answer!Not your original work?Add sourcePublish
Modal close
Add Your Answer!Not your original work?Add sourcePublish
Not your original work?Add sourcePublish
Not your original work?Add source
Modal closeModal closeOoops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB.UploadUploadError occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again.TwitterRender conversationUse html versionGenerate not embedded versionAdd watermarkInstagramShow Image OnlyHide CaptionCropAdd watermarkFacebookShow Image OnlyAdd watermarkChangeSourceTitleUpdateAdd Image
Modal closeOoops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB.UploadUploadError occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again.TwitterRender conversationUse html versionGenerate not embedded versionAdd watermarkInstagramShow Image OnlyHide CaptionCropAdd watermarkFacebookShow Image OnlyAdd watermarkChangeSourceTitleUpdateAdd Image
Ooops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB.
Upload
UploadError occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again.TwitterRender conversationUse html versionGenerate not embedded versionAdd watermarkInstagramShow Image OnlyHide CaptionCropAdd watermarkFacebookShow Image OnlyAdd watermark
Error occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again.
TwitterRender conversationUse html versionGenerate not embedded versionAdd watermark
InstagramShow Image OnlyHide CaptionCropAdd watermark
FacebookShow Image OnlyAdd watermark
ChangeSourceTitle
You May Like30 Of The Most Hilarious Posts From Parents That Made People Laugh This FebruaryIlona Baliūnaitė“Putting Their Child In A Beauty Pageant”: 30 Behaviors That Scream “Trashy Parenting”Shelly Fourer40 Pics Of Dads Being Extra Wholesome That Are Bound To Warm Your Heart (New Pics)Justinas Keturka
Ilona Baliūnaitė
Shelly Fourer
Justinas Keturka
Parenting
